IJ

I dunno what to write ... I just want to write something ..

2006-05-02T02:12:00.001+05:30

I think I get too easily influenced by movies/TV/books and the likes ... I mean .. one day I watch Gladiator .. and I want to go back in time and be a soldier who fights with mighty swords ... some time later I am reading about Mr. Richard Branson and his Virgin group of companies .. and I want to work on little business plans and become a business tycoon. Then I watch Coupling, which is a sitcom, somewhat like friends you can say ... and I want to be no one special .. I just want to lie around all day .. have a small happy life ... drink beer .. speak with a british accent ...etc. I see Godfather ... I want to be all powerful .. not a mafia , but really really powerful ... I watch Sarkar ... I even change my way of walking temporarily to something I think is a more powerful walk ... it sure felt powerful, I felt powerful ...Then I return to the book .. and I again want to be earning loads of money ...
I watch more films ... I go more paranoid ....
After some time I think I want to become a movie director.
That thought is not alien to my mind ... I have always wanted to become a director ... maybe only a play director earlier .. but a director ..
but I never gave it much thought ... all the job security and happy life, getting fat sitting confortable on my ass, all secure and everything, everything filled up in my mind that I guess one picks up sub-consciously through his life ... I never thought of taking any risk with my life before ...
But a part of getting influenced by all the media is that you pick up a lot of carelessness ... or you can say more risk taking ... and now I want to , well .. take some risks .. like trying direction for instance ...
And again .. I want to do an MBA .. sit on my comfortable ass and count loads of money ...
This decision making .. I can leave it for a while, for a year or so I guess ... but when you are sitting at home getting fucking bored ... every single thought is thought and re-thought. You can't help it ... if you don't want to think about it ... then you are actually thinking about it and thinking that I shouldn't be thinking about it, which is basically thinking about it.
What do I do ?
--
Anyways ...
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Exam time ahead ...
Results came out today ... I am , as usual, amongst the last few people in my class ... and as usual .. the system and the crappy subjects are to be blamed ..
Think I'll write a song about the "System" some day .... and then me and my would-be band can perform it ... we may become famous you know...

But I don't think I want to become a rock star ...
I am pretty sure about this one, I think.

Title

2006-03-31T19:22:00.000+05:30

Hi ...
(Still out of ideas on how to start..)

Lots happening in my life these days ... well not a whole lot ... but reasonable amount of activity considering my otherwise monotonous routine. So where do I start ?

Indian Ocean performed in my college ...

Awesome. Actually ... their music is beyond awesome. And to see them live is like whole new heights of beyond-awesomeness. 2 hours of pure ecstacy ....
"Samay ki laal Aandhi ..."

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I had so much to write .... I thought it would be a mega post or something ... and now I can't remember anything ...
Wtf ...

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I am going off to Mumbai for two months this summer to do some training. Earlier another friend was going with me ... but now it's just me ... me in the big city ... maybe I'll get bored but I so desperately want to get away from my home right now that I accepted it and so .... whatever will be ... will be ...
So many things will be new there ... no 24-hour internet .. infact no computer at all ... no car ... lousy food... living in a hostel ... all will be new for me ... but I'm kinda looking forward to it ...
(I will have my iPod (..that I'll soon buy) .. )

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Seems like not much has been going on in my life after all .. I'm just plain excited about the Bombay thing ...
Whatever ...

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Here are some things I have been enojoying all this time ..

My Rating ****1/2 (Must see)
My Rating **** (Must see)
My Rating **** (Must see, if not already)
My Rating **1/2 (Don't see unless die hard Matthew Perry Fan)
My Rating ***** (You Kidding ? Collin Rocks !!)

Others were the sitcom 'Coupling' (good) and the book 'Runaway Jury' by John Grisham ... but I'm tired of searching for images ...

Anyway ... that is it for now ...

Title

2006-02-25T18:32:00.000+05:30

"How you doin' ??"
(Sorry ... totally out of ideas on how to strat a post)

So ... I have been busy for a while (for a change) ..

Ok ..

First ... I went to GIR (Great Indian Rock X) ... and man does it rock .... Here is a pic I clicked using my phone cam :

So we went to GIR and I had no fucking idea how awesome it could be until it started ... after that we left track of time ... Also I was kinda stoned (and it does feel like flying and all that anyone ever said) ... I had to try it once ... probably was the first and the last time ... but it was some experience. All the music and all the dope ..
Anyways ... The Superfuzz won the competition ... I think they were good ... but I liked Mantra and Acrid Semblance better. After that I downloaded loads of Indian Rock Bands' songs ... and man some of them are really good ...

What else ?
We had this technical fest (a fest for the engineering side of you) in our college .. and I lost every competition I took part in ... even the ones I was sure I'd win .. one hell of a bad luck run ...
After that there was this party to mark the end of the fest .. we went to this ok type looking pub ... but once inside we realized that it kicked major ass with its awesome sound system and everything ... so we danced and danced and my legs still hurt ... but it was great ...

What else ?
The return of Friends thingy that I mentioned in my last post seems to be true ... and man I'm too excited ... also there is this news that there'll be a new spinoff series starring all the three friends male characters ... which means ... that Matthew Perry will be back .... Wooo hoo ... It's called something like It's A Guy Thing .. Cheezy kinda name ... but Perry can make everything worth its watch ... man I simply loved his character in Friends ...

What else ?
I saw no new movie ... I read no new book .. I started reading Atlas Shrugged again .. from the point I had dropped it the last time ... it still does not interest me that much ... I think I'll read Fountainhead again ... now that's a book to be read any no. of times ...

What else ?
I'll be completing my third year in college this year which means that now I'll have to devote much more time to college than I have been all these three years ...
Also I'm kinda torn .. To do MBA or not to do MBA .. that is the question ...
In my ideal dream world ... I do an MBA... then join a big MNC ... in a few(4-5) years ... I quit as the CEO of the company to start my own venture .. I become the big business baron in no time .. then I start funding politics and then ultimately I join the politics myself .. Finally .. when I'm somewhat old .. I'll make a movie .. and that'll mark the the end of one sucessful life ... in the ideal dream world ..
But in this new dream that has been creeping on for a few days ... I continue in my field after engineering ... start my own venture ... and the rest of the story remains quite the same ...
So I'm torn ....
In reality I might ending up working in a software firm like TCS/Infosys or somewhere ..... but that is different and does not affect the ideal dream world ...

Anyways ... quite a long post now (compare it to my last one) ... so I'd leave it here ... next one in a month or so ....

As good as it gets ....

2006-01-25T22:02:00.000+05:30

I can't believe this .....
Wooo hooo .......

Pretty boring post .. but I had to write something ..

2006-01-08T16:14:00.001+05:30

Ok ... back ... atleast for this post , i.e.
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I have been thinking of blogging for quite some time now ... infact .. I never got off blogging actually ... still checked my blog once in a while for any comments .. and to my surprise ... people actually did stop by my blog ... even 2 months after I said goodbye ... Seriously .. I am touched .
A lot of times ... I thought that this or that would make such a good post ... but I never wrote anything ..
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So where have I been all this time ??
Well ... here and there .. (here , mainly ..)
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After the last time I blogged ... lets see ... first notable event I think was papers ... a royal screw always ...
Post papers ... I have been enjoying holidays .. sitting at home ...
What all did I do after papers .. ummm .... Ya ... I downloaded all the 10 seasons of Friends and saw them ... was totally hooked on to them ... and man were they good ... then I downloaded Joey .. which is a spinoff sitcom from friends .. not half as good though .. seen it, anyone ?
Then I read a couple of books .. lets see .. I have been hooked on to fantasy mainly .. I read the Hobbit and the three LOTR books ... awesome ... Then I read the Godfather ... awsome as well ... Then I read the 6 Harry Potter books (finally .. after ages of saying that I'll never read them ..) ... but they are really good actually ...
I saw loads of movies ... I saw Godfather 1 & 2 again ... Then ... Kill Bill 1 & 2 ... awesome movies I tell you .... Tarantino is too good .... then I saw This Spanish movie The Motorcycle Diaries ... another good one ... and last I saw a half of Fear and Lothing in Las Vegas ... couldn't watch rest of it ... Oh .. and I also saw this movie Lost in Translation ... pretty wierd movie actually ...
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And I went to this college trip to Dehradun ... really enjoyed there a lot ... also celebrated the New Year there ...
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What else ? (Ah .. now I'm really back ..)
I gave up smoking on new year ... and finally smoked today ... (usual crap actually ... dunno why I still bother with it .. )
Colleges re-open tomorrow ... and after a long time , I am actually looking foreward to it ... but to say the truth .. I'm truly bored with engineering ... and its still one and a half years to go ...
I signed up for MBA enterance exam preperation classes .... Dunno how many exams I'll have to give my entire life ... seems like all that I have done these last 5 years is give exams ..
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Nothing else that I can think of right now ...
Pretty boring post, eh ? (I don't mind a 'yes' in the answer to that).

2005-10-02T23:21:00.000+05:30

Well ... it's been ages since I posted something here (more than a month ... this was not even imaginable when I started blogging you know) ... but anyways ... here goes another post ...

Well I don't know what to write exactly and have nothing in particular to write about ...
Anyways .. here are a few things ..
First ... a piece of advice I'll give while my wrath is still fresh ..... heed to it ... and never forget it ... Now suppose you are sitting on someone else's computer and checking out his huge collection of songs and have this particular inkiling to hear some of the sickest song of his collection (like Linkin Park) ... then DO NOT double click on the song file .... NEVER double click on a song file... I mean do you have any fucking idea that it takes a lot of time to come up with a decent playlist selecting songs from some 15-20 GB of music ? Whenever you want to hear some song .. right click on the name of the song ... there is this second option that says 'Enqueue in winamp' .. click on that option .. and when winamp opens ... scroll to the bottom of the playlist to the song .. doubleclick ... and hear it. But never doubleclick straightaway on the song file. Ok ?
(If anybody knows of a plugin to remember your playlist .. then please let me know ...)

***

Some time backI saw this movie "Hazaaron Khwahishein Aisi" ... awesome movie ... and I saw the three LOTR movies (Special Extended edition) ... which were also awesome ... though not awesome in the same sense as the former was ... but it was still awesome ... specially the special effects in the war scene at Helms deep...
Then I am reading LOTR the book .... and am realizing that the movie people have changed almost all of the story ...
Book reminds me that I read this really amazing book God of Small Things ... which seemed a bit gloomy in the beginning , but in the end it turned out to be simply superb. I remember that I had started reading this book earlier , in class 8th maybe , when it had just won the booker. that time I had thought that it is a collection of small stories ... so I took out the smallest chapter and read it .... in the end I just returned the book to the library thinking that maybe incomprehensible books only won the booker. But I guess even if I would have read this book then ... I would have not like it ....

What else ?
Umm... ( I was actually thinking when I wrote that "umm .." .. I still am ... ummm.....) .. Ya .. I was going through some blogs right now when I read this poem by someone (Can be acknowledged if he wants to be) , which I am posting here without permission :
Twinkle Twinkle blasted star
I know who the hell you are
Up above in the goddamn sky
Just a ****ing firefly
Now the reason I posted this poem here is coz I think it rhymes really well ... which you'd realize if you sing it in tune ... and then it makes you laugh even harder ..

What else II ?
I don't fell like blogging anymore ... the thing that seemed so important to me just some months ago has lost all its charm and everyhting .. and so I don't feel like blogging anymore. The reason why I wrote that was coz I wanted to tell you all that I may not post again ever ... and maybe I may post tomorrow if I feel like it ... but at any rate I want you all to know ... that it was nice to know you all and it was nice to read your blogs (though I often did not read many of them) ... but some of them were, and are, real favorites ... and I'd continue reading them for a while ...

What else III ?
Concerning smoking .. I left it (for about 3 weeks) ... then smoked after my last exam (couldn't help it) .. then left it again ... then again smoked .. then left it ... and let's see when I smoke again (I desperately want one right now..). The thing is that before you start smoking ... there is this taboo in your mind ... so you don't smoke .... but after you have smoked some times ... there is nothing to stop you .. and then it is difficult to stop it .... so never try it in the first place ...

What else IV ? (No use trying to guess what these letters mean if you can't read roman numerals)
I was talking to a girl yesterday. She used to be in school with me . We were talking after a long time ... and admist the talk I realized that things have changed so much ... I mean ... we were in school some time back ... and now here I am asking about her new job , her salary , her weekly off etc. . Hmm... things have really changed ... I couldn't even imagine me thinking that I would one day consider her to be a really stupid girl while I daresay I had a thing or two for her during schooltime.

What else V ?
I went to this IITD rock thingy a few days back ... and it was like totally crap. First it was such an ordeal to get in. When I finally did get in ... I realized I had missed two bands .. out of four that were slated to play ... the other two ... one was Parikrama ... which was good ... the other was this band Bramha ,I think that was the name, ... whatever ... but they sucked big time .. I mean I almost wanted to kick the singer in his groin ... he spoilt it ... though the guitar and everyhting else was fine .. so I got really bored and was getting really desperate to leave the place when he pulled on a crowd favorite ... In the End by Linkin Park ... now I don't know why people like this song .... but I absolutely hate the song and the band ... and everytime I hear this band ... I feel like thrashing that rapper ... he sucks so much .... and you should see this other guy (who I presume does some sound mixing or something) .... he goes totally crazy as if the shit of the music is driving him into some kind of trance ... whatever ... the band is beyond me ...

What else VI ?
Well , nothing much. The End.

(Now that was a different ending ... tell you what .. I kinda enjoyed writing this post ... I may write more in near future ..).

And more

2005-08-27T22:26:00.000+05:30

Then he said, "I like cigarettes, Miss Taggart. I like to think of fire held in a man's hand. Fire, a dangerous force, tamed at his fingertips. I often wonder about the hours when a man sits alone, watching the smoke of a cigarette, thinking. I wonder what great things have come from such hours. When a man thinks, there is a spot of fire alive in his mind—and it is proper that he should have the burning point of a cigarette as his one expression."
-- Ayn Rand (Atlas Shrugged)

Well ... that quote in that book was kinda out of place ... you see ... while Ayn Rand in a way glorified independence of man , the state one is no longer dependent on any other ... she glorified the dependence on a cigarette .... why ? Coz she was a chain smoker. She still lived to be 94 though . The lines were good , anyways ....
The basic point in starting this post like this is that I started smoking. I always was facinated by it .... only recently I gave in finally ... not that I regret it ... but yes .. sometimes I do ...
It all started with me being drunk and trying a drag ... then some time later .. I smoked a full cigarette , just to know what it felt like ... and then I understood why so many people smoked .. and I started with it too ...
I really do not feel regret .... no that is not the right word ... I just feel kinda sad that I gave in to a dependency ...
But lets leave it at that ....

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I saw Sarkar ... awsome movie ... and finger to anyone who says it even resembles Godfather . The reason I didn't watch Sarkar earlier was coz of the comparison to Godfather. But it was so completely different and so fucking awsome. Godfather , I think is overrated though ...
And I saw My Wife's Murder .... strictly average movie. But Boman Irani , as always ... stands out ... he is one class act .

What else ?
College is completely boring ... and I long for holidays again (and it was the other way round in the holidays).
Eldest , second book of inheritence is out ... and I finally ordered the book at a price of Rs.611 ...

Ummm.... everything else that I had intended to write has simply vanished from my mind ... so ... that'll be it.

I'm back ...

2005-08-22T19:01:00.000+05:30

I guess I am back for some time. Hmm.. but we'll pretend that I was never gone (dare you compare this with the new Backstreet boys album title) ... well , college started again ... so I got sth to write about ....
Here ... this incidence some days back in college ...
Me and J went to the class ... and J got into some kinda verbal fight with someone ... some time later he called the other guy a "Sisterfucker" .... well . kinda normal ... no big deal ... happens all the time ... but this guy ... man he went crazy .... he started to hit J and then things got out of control .... J started to hit back . Things settled in some time. Apparently the other guy got all angry because of the cuss ... and the funny thing being .... he was trying to explain to his freinds how important it was to hit J in such circumstances. what an asshole ... I thought. But that was not it .... later I asked that guy what he'd do if there were a hundred people calling him a sisterfucker (calling him that was an understatement actually ... I would have said sth even worse ..) .. now I was expecting some sense to come to his mind hearing my question ... but his reply startled me .. "Mar jaaoonga , kat jaaoonga .. lekin behen ke baare mein kuchh nahin sunoonga .."(Will die but not hear anything against my sister).... man ... what a tool ... I wanted to lie at his feet and worship him for that "Dialogue" (filmy .. totally) ... and at the same time I wanted to kick his thing so hard to squish his balls into pulp .... I mean what kinda big asshole can one be .... What did he want to show ? Aadarsh ? Ethincs ? Total shit ... Of all the foolish people I have ever met ... he was one of the biggest ...
With writing all this I mean to convey one message ... if you have the same shit in you ... change it. And if you are one of them ... then this here ... just for you .. the next few lines .... siserfucker , motherfucker , fatherfucker , grandfatherfucker , grandmotherfucker , familyfucker , unvirsefucker (and everything else) .... DIE.

There ... I think I am feeling better now ...

New Post

2005-07-25T12:10:00.000+05:30

Life is boring , generally , these days. I just sit at home and read these ebooks on the computer. Not that that is boring , but it tends to make my neck ache after a while , and by evening , even my eyes hurt a bit. So , I leave the ebook after a while , to do some other things .... this is where the boredom starts. Coz there is not much to do. It is still one week before the college opens.
Meanwhile , it has again become fucking hot in Delhi , along with loads of humidity , which just compounds the problem. So you can't even go out.
The ebook I am reading these days is from this series called the Dragonlance series . This series has hoards of books (130 , I read somewhere ... but they are defnitely more than 25-30). I just finished with the first trilogy , the chronicles (first generation) :
-Dragons of the autumn twilight
-Dragons of the winter night
-Dragons of the spring dawning
Now I am beginning with the second trilogy ... the legend series .. about the twins. One of them being a magi ... how I love reading abut this character. Frankly , I have become a fantasy nut. It all started with this book called Eragon , whose pirated copy I finally managed to find and read. As soon as I finished with that .... I needed more dragons ... and then I finally stumbled upon this dragonlance series. Though things are a lot different in the two books ... but I love this series anyways.
Then I saw this movie 'Snatch'. Awsesome movie. Don't miss it .... I really loved this movie.
Ummm... what else ? I guess , that is about it. That pretty much wraps what I have been doing this week.
I wanted to write something more about fantasy and magic , and the hope they generate ... the whole thing I that I was thinking the other day ... but I just forgot whatever I was thinking. So ... chuck it ...
That will be all for this post.

Where have I been ?

2005-07-15T16:39:00.000+05:30

Its been some time since I last posted. I was not very busy , just that the thought of leaving blogging had come to my mind again. Why ? I dunno ...... like a friend said : "There's so much i have to do in life...if i ever do it,then there will be something to write about.right now i am saturated with it." But like always ... I talked myself into it again ...
So ... what do I write in this post ?

It has pretty much been a boring week. First there was this super crappy marrriage. Crappy by all standards. Lousy food , no chicken .. and no Daru. How useless can a marriage get ? And it was so fucking hot ... I was half drowned in sweat by the time I reached the AC hall inside. At last it ended .. and I came back to Delhi.

I saw this movie called 'Eyes wide shut'. Remember ? Stanley Kubriks last movie ? The one with loads of sex in it ... Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise ... , so I saw it ... and couldn't make heads or tails of it .... it ended so suddenly .. had I not seen the casting .. I would have never believed that the movie was complete. Well .. there are some things that are made for the really intelligent beings .. with everything having meanings in layers. I can't really bother to even think for their meaning ... the reason I used to really like Govinda type movies ... no brain required to see them ... and even if you start seeing them 1.5 hrs after the movie started ... you'll understand every bit of the movie ... and there is plenty of laughter.
I also saw Shawshank Redemption ... amazing movie.

I started with a Grisham (The Partner).

Umm... what else ..
Ya ... got drinking again yesterday. And while at the peak of the high ... I had the following conversation with one of my friend (three of us were there) :
N : "You remember I told you about this professor who became schizophrenic ?"
Me : "Ya"
N : "You know who he is ?"
Me : "No"
N : "He is my dad."
( And then he began to cry. And believe me ... I was stunned ... I didn't know what to say for some time. )
N : "You know ... everybody used to laugh at him. They used to make fun of him .. and laughed at me too. I got admission in the same university he taught .. and used to attend his each class ... I was the only one .. alone .. I sent my mother and siblings away. I used to keep awake with him for all those nights .. and used to talk to him. Only I know how I got through those two years. But I am not crying because I feel weak. It's just that when I remember those two years ..."
Me : (Knowing that its no use sympathising with him) "How is he now ?"
N : "He is ok now. You know why I came into engineering ? Somebody told my father that I would become no one .. a failiure. I decided that day ... and so I left that course mid-way. These tears only make me more determined." (Long Pause) "And people ask me why do I keep so alone .."

You know you had to be there to realize the magnitude of pain flowing through the surrounding space. Even I felt like crying ..

2005-07-08T21:32:00.000+05:30

DOS is a really nice thing. It may be fucking old ... but at least it has the sense to leave you alone and not ask you many questions ... or be very intelligent like the windows and try to intervene in everything that a sane person wants to do on his computer. They made nice things back then.
Then Windows happened.

Just Another Post

2005-07-07T14:22:00.000+05:30

I have come to a conclusion. Blogs .. like people, have a life. They live , they attain glory , and they die. Some live forever , some can barely make it past one post , but they all have a definite life span.
People who start with blogs have loads of ideas when they start. Then they start visiting other blogs .. and then the comments. They present their thoughts .. and sculpt another personality virtually. They begin enjoying it .. and then it seems really fine. But after sometime ... they go blank. Suddenly it becomes a burden to write anything else. Or their virtual Personality starts to look really virtual .. far away from reality. Some people then just leave their blogs , others take a long break ... and others kill their blogs.
And it is not about them only ... I have thought about this so many times myself. I have thought about killing my blog so many times ... but I have come to depend on it so much. Maybe .. one day I may be able to leave blogging ... I definitely have been blank for some time now.
Three people whose blog I used to read often , pulled the plug off their blog recently. Maybe they'd get back some day. Maybe they won't.
I don't know where I am heading with writing all of this .. but it is kinda sad you know .... like when a long time freind departs.
Anyways ... things move on ... always did.

Not bored anymore

2005-07-06T21:29:00.000+05:30

I didn't get bored these past three days. Not even once.
Went to Ambala to meet some cousins , and then went off to Shimla from there. It was raining all the way .. and it was raining in Shimla too. We could only get one evening out on the mall road ... rest was spent in the hotel room. The rains just didn't stop. So we returned in a day. But it was nice. Boozed again. This cousin of mine got a Johnny Walker Red Label. The night was spent emptying the bottle. Finally we did.
There was this cousin who started crying after having lots of drink (how I hate people doing it). Then there was this other cousin from Delhi , who drank a trifle too much , and got embarassed when her head reeled under a bacardi. But it was real fun. We sat there talking about everything from what is wrong in India to bitching about people and all. Drunken talk mainly.
Hills become really beautiful in the rains. Loved it there. But it is good to be back in Delhi.
Couldn't check the blogs there .. those people used IE that stores all the adresses by default .. and I didn't want them to see this blog. Ofcourse I could have deleted that list .. but it was their comp .. and they used that list .. so I couldn't. Anyways ... now I am back.
Umm.. what else ? Had planned a big post this time ... but now I can't remember a thing I had intended to write.
Ya .. I read this book called Eragon. On Dragons and all. Awsome book ... just can't wait for the second part. Now I am reading a JHC (It is called : Do me a favour , Drop Dead). Picked this one because this one was the only one without a raunchy photograph on its cover.
Umm...
Nothing else to post about. Over and out.

Daru , Palika and Spirits

2005-06-29T13:26:00.001+05:30

Here's another 'what's new' post ...

I finally drank yesterday .... drank to my hearts content ... unlike in pubs where you have to drink to a limit coz there is a home you got to return to and you are driving ... this time we were drinking in a hotel room .. some of my cousins had come over ...
They got this Smirn-off citrus yesterday ... nice flavour ....

Other things .. I went to Palika again yesterday ... and like a lot of times ... all the MP3 shops were closed for a week or so due to raids by police and all. I bet all of them are mixed up ... the CD people and the police ... it's just that they close down temprorily to pacify someone high up.
Went to CP then ... and I found out that Pizza Hut people have started serving beer too ... Fosters ... had some of that too ... but I am not much of a beer drinker ... beer makes you fat .. and doesn't even give a big high ... so I always prefer Vodka/whisky etc. ..
What else ? Umm... Ya ... I spotted this shop in Palika selling Guitar learning videos .. along with similar videos for drums , flutes , etc. and then other videos had judo-karate instructions .. and then there were loads of music videos and concerts .. man .. this market never ceases to amaze me .. but I didn't get anything from that shop ... 375 for one fucking CD ? ... I'd rather download it from the net ..

And .. what else ?
I downloaded these movies from the net :
Shawshank Redemption
Snatch
Taxi Driver
Dr Strangelove or : How not to worry and love the bomb
Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind

And wanted to download My cousin Vinny .. couldn't find it ..
Then I downloaded this video of this song called Keine Lust by Rammstein. This group sings in German , but they rock. Nice video ... all dressed like really fat people and head banging and all ..

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Day before yesterday .. it was raining all day here .. lovely weather ... I went to college for that project ... but couldn't just sit inside the lab .. so the three of us came out and sat there enjoying the fine weather. We got talking on drinking and smokes. The talk shifted to dope. We were discussing how does it feel like after a whiff of Marijuana. Now I haven't ever tried them .. nor my freind .. G had tried it .. so she was telling us about the high and all. I made up my mind to try it once ... but again .. later that day I thought against it. Then we got talking on scary movies .. from where the talks drifted to planchette (I had to do a lot of googling to get this word right ..) .. then we sat there talking about planchette ... now I had always considered it a story till one of my very fast freinds told me he had witnessed it ... I have never witnessed it myself ... but I would love to ... then G began explaining the intricacies and the people she knew who practiced witch craft and occults etc.... and evil spirits and all ..... it was quite funny you know ... and it was raining all the time ..

Another new post ...

2005-06-26T03:29:00.000+05:30

So .. lets see ...

What's new ?
TATA Indcom people finally changed my connection to an unlimited one .. and my computer has been ON ever since. I downloaded some videos , loads of music and I am now downloading some movies ... where will the world be without P2P ?

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Anyways .... I have decided to stop updating ... what I am writing here no longer holds any meaning to me .. it is just that since the space is to be updated in a matter of some days, that I am updating it ... and that is not how it should be ..
I had started blogging for a specific purpose , back in December last year ... but lets leave the purpose ... lets concentrate on the fact that I no longer have anything to update this blog with ... I can't write anything like poetry , stories or anything like that .. I can only read some of them and admire them , though probably understanding very little of it. The other thing being that I can't write anything else too .. thought that this will pass .. but it doesn't ... I am pretty much blank ... anything I write here now will be only forced ... and that is not how good things are written ... at least I can never write anything good when I want to write "something". Whatever I have written ... most of the posts ... they were not composed staring at the screen .. they were composed in my mind .. the outine of the post and everything. And now when I sit down to write down a post , I can't seem to write anything ... I mean I can write a lot of things .. but then I'll fly off at tangents ,. just not concentrating on the post ... and then what will take shape will be a mess of a post .. and I don't want that ... I am sitting at home these days so I can't even update it with 'What I did today' kinda posts .. I hate writing such stuff anyways ... there is no other thing I want to write just now ... (And fuck .. I have written so much already ... having nothing to write ? ... but all this is just explaining the situation).

But what's the use of writing all this ?
I'll update in a few days with another post stating the new ways I got bored in ... just for the heck of it .. and just for them comments ... and just for killing some time ...

----

I can write a 'bored 3' now ... coz I am still bored ... It is 3 in the night and I can't sleep .. and there is no one online ... so I am all the more bored .. chat on Yahoo sucks ...
I feel like doing nothing in particular ..

Hmmm... I think I'll read a book then ... finish off with this one .. and hope that the next one is good enough ...
k .... Goodnight ..

Bored 2

2005-06-22T22:11:00.000+05:30

I was getting really bored .. so I thought that maybe writing a post will help me .. then I'll wait for the comments ..
So here goes another post .. pretty random and boring .... but if you have read uptill this point ( X <-- This point , X marks the spot) , then read on furthur ...
Anyways .. I have nothing specific to write in this post ...
Weather is a killer .. man the heat in Delhi .. it got a bit like rain in the evening .. but the weather is so god damn bad ... and to top that .. I have to go to fucking markets to shop for the upcoming marriage ... how much crap can a person bear ? First I hate marriage ceremonies .. and then I hate shopping .. and you can't even wear a suit in this fucking heat ...
Then I have not had a drop of alcohol since the colleges closed .. I feel so .. ummm ... 'Daru-less' ..
And I am getting bored ...

And .. and .. and .. ummm.... I dunno .. nothing else .... got up today, brushed my teeth , took shit , took a bath ... umm.. got bored ... got more bored ... and will go off to sleep in some time ...

Was planning to post some kinda funny pic .. but I can't remember which pic was it that I had thought of posting ...
In other things ... Sigma Protocol is not a very great book ... but I got hold of a copy of Eragon today .. will read that next ...
Oh God .. I have written so much crap .. but that is what happens when you get bored and you get a broadband connection ...

Ok ... yippetty yoppetty yippetty .. that's all folks ...

Bored

2005-06-20T15:27:00.000+05:30

I'm fucking bored. Nothing to do ... no where to go ... no money left to spend .... wtf do I do ?
I got a broadband connection the day before .. and believe me ... I feel even more bored now then I was before with my dial-up.
So I decided to explore some new blogs yesterday ... but it got really boring after a while ... and then I tried the chat scene on Yahoo .... and man does it suck ... there are shit loads of ass holes who come up there to chat with fuckingly stupid alias names that have all kinds of crappy adjectives like cute , creative , hot etc. ... with loads of underscores seperating them ... screaming out that they are basically everything but that .... I got pretty fed up and left the chat rooms. It was 4 in the night that time ... so I again went to all the blogs ... and everyone gets so damn lazy on a weekend .. no body bothers to update ... and then there are people who bring down their comment boxes ..
I tried Launch cast ... it is quite nice ... loved a few tracks ...
Ayways ... then I went off to sleep ..
Went to the college today .. and everybody but the stupid prof turned up .. so I came back ... and now I am again bored ...
Monday today ... even the CD shops are closed so I couldn't even get a movie.

I am listening to system of a down ... they are pretty awsome .. downloaded some of their videos ... good ones ... hear it if you like a bit of hard rock ... ain't very hard though ..
I also heard songs from this movie called Tajmahal (yet to be released) ... I really liked two of the songs ... hear them if you like ...... umm... I dunno . Most of the people around me didn't like it .. so it is up to you ... I really loved one of the tracks ...

In other things .. I finally left Atlas Shrugged and started with a new one .... Ludlum.

And ... ummmm..... nothing else ....
keep updating ... so will I ...

New Post

2005-06-17T17:51:00.000+05:30

Update : (Sorry I am pretty blank to think of any other method to start this post)

Another close , crappy marriage coming up. This will not be as big an affair as some of the previous marriages I attended , since this is on my fathers side and these people do not have much money. Also this means that there will be no liquor :( .
These relaties came over to discuss some matters with my parents and I had to sit along yesterday. And again I get this sick feeling about marriage ceremonies. I mean .. get a load of this ... my mother and my aunt were discussing the ceremonies and to my surprise none was sure of the right way a particular ceremony is held. So they called up some old people to ask about the crap and then made sure of the ceremonies that have to take place. I happened to ask about the need for these ceremonies when nobody was sure about them .... "Everything should go according to customs. You don't know .. people tend to cath the smallest flaw in these ceremonies" .. fuck the ceremonies and fuck the people.
So this will be another 4-5 days of hell for me.

----

I have been thinking lately the importance of piracy in my life. Pirated books , movies, software, music and loads of other stuff. Where would I be without piracy ?
I went to the mother of all piracy markets - Palika Bazaar, the day before. And you have to go there yourself to believe it. That is one place that has all the pirated techno stuff under one roof. And the way that market has developed is amazing .. these people have educated themselves with the time. So when I go there and tell them to give me an AC/DC CD , they don't look blank, they don't look surprised ... they just take out the CD from their vast collections. And they also have all kinds of posters .. high quality ones ... football and rock .. and rock means serious rock and metal stuff like Pantera and slipknot (some of them still think that Britney and Backstreet boys do rock ... but that'll pass too ..). And then there were good quality football jerseys (though I hate wearing one .. but some freind was interested) , concert videos and all kinds of techno stuff like MP3 players , 4.1/5.1 speaker systems and other things. And to my surprise I even saw something that looked like a dildo .. though I could be wrong .. but I seriously don't think I am. Now dildos ain't a very big thing .. but considering that this is India .. well .. I dunno ... maybe I am not updated with the latest.

----

In other things .. I happen to turn 20 tomorrow (Ya ya .. thanks and all that) .. which means that I'll be recieving a lot of cards and other such worthless stuff. Now what I hate about cards is that they do not serve any purpose ... why send a card ?.. why don't you send me those 20 bucks instead .. at least I'll collect all the card money , have some beer and thank you in my heart. But cards ... are such meaingless stuff. Only people that benifit out these cards are the super big thieves that work at the international level under the name of Archies . They print meaningless stuff on a paper and sell it. People go out buying them and then they gift it to someone. Now what I don't understand is .. what do I do with these cards after I have read them once ? I have seen people collecting cards gifted to them ... but what for ? I find them a totally useless thing. And same for other Archie stuff. Photo frames and other crappy stuff you can fill your table top with .. pretty useless .. so I generally go for the "cash" option whenever some sensible person chooses to ask me what I want for my birthday.

New Post

2005-06-14T00:23:00.000+05:30

I have nothing much to write about .. and inspired by MWNN's blog (no offence intended ... inspired does not mean the way bollywood films are inspired from hollywood ... it is more like one is inspired by Shakespere to start writing ;) ).. I am posting whatever that comes up in my mind ... read it if you got nothing else to do ...

----

I think I'll leave Atlas Shrugged for now .. it is getting too damn boring .. I can't help it ... it is like an overdose of Ayn Rand ... to much heroism ... so I'll start with "One flew over Cuckoos nest" now. Or maybe "The Godfather".

Saw Pulp Fiction yesterday (yes , all these years I never saw it) ... and man this what a movie should be like ... perfect ... wow ... this movie has become my all time favorite ... I've seen it thrice already . It is such an awesome movie .. it has changed my benchmarks for rating movies ... Seen it ?

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides with the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherd the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon those with great vengeance and with furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know that my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee." (Don't give it a thought if you haven't seen the movie)
So that one dialogue was repeated around 3 times by Samuel Jackson in the movie ... and I really loved the way he said it.
This ..... ummm .......... nothing.

----

More .... I just saw Hitch , and I don't know why people liked it so much ... it was so mushy ... the chick was good though. But well ... I didn't like the movie very much. Tell you what ... I just don't have taste for these kinda movies .. so I don't generally like them. I just got too damn bored seeing it. You don't think that it was somewhat cliched ? Well .. I did ... dunno why ?

Next probably I'll post on "The Godfather" , the movie.

This week

2005-06-10T19:40:00.004+05:30

I saw Parineeta today and it was what I had expected. Crap. Seeing this movie I felt that the only difference between this movie and the olden movies that were crap was that these days they have such a wonderful feel to a movie. I mean this movie had a particular colour tone all over the movie , details were looked after in recreating 1962 ... but the story was such a big pile of crap. And then Saif Ali Khan uprooted a marble fountain and broke open a wall in the end. I didn't like the chick too. So I would rate the movie 1/5. Thankgod I spent only 50 bucks on the shit.
Anyways , that was about this movie I saw. In other things I've been doing lately ... I've been reading Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand and I've been working on a project in college.
Atlas Shrugged is starting to bore me out and I am still not done with the first part. But the whole book seems so similar ... there are always two types of people - the heros and the secondhanders. The heros always keep a straight face , love working , 'smile easily' at everything , 'laugh noiselessly' , and generally give shit about the other group , the second-handers. Everyone in the other groups is always concerned about each other and always tries to glorify values like humanity and other crap. Fountainhead made an excellent read , but this is like an overdose. Still I'm reading it , god knows why (and for this Ayn Rand will call me a perfect Secondhander or a depraved human being).

In other news, I got a CD today and was told not to open a particular folder. The folder was named porn ... so I went ahead and opened it anyway. Well .. the first clip was pretty useless .. the second one was good. It was just the way I like it. A woman who did not look like an overworked whore (and was beautiful too) , nice place they had for screwing, nice print , great music and they started off passionately .. I hate the porn films which start from a guy humping a girl straight away. So , the second clip was good ...

--
In other things ... well ...... there are no other things .. it is vacation time and it is generally eventless (specially when you go nearly broke at the start of the month) .. so .. I am just looking forward to sleeping and reading this weekend .

2005-06-03T23:59:00.001+05:30

This post can get a bit sad.

I want to write something really beautiful.
I can't write anything remotely beautiful.
Mockery is my forte .. and I'm tired of it, not on the blog, elsewhere.
I'm tired of joking around laughing everything out.
I'm tired of not performing.
I want to drink a lot.
I am tired of engineering.
Why should I post this crap ?
She started blogging.
She writes so beautifully .. I may fall for her again.
I want to play the guitar really fast. So fast that ..
What is life ?
Who is John Galt ?
I don't know what exactly I want to do.
And this life ?
What lies ahead ?
A vortex of thoughts.

No don't comment and tell me to cheer up ..
I'll be ok tomorrow.

Nah .. it didn't get sad.

Statutory Warning ?

2005-05-31T16:44:00.000+05:30

Every cigarette box carries this statutory warning : Cigarette smoking is injurious to health. Ever heard of one person who gave up smoking because of the warning ? What do they think ... will people go something like "Oops .. cigarette smoking is injurious to health .. shit .. I gotta quit smoking." .. ? Tell you what .. everyone who is good enough to read that warning does not need it .. he/she knows that it is harmful. It is just that those who can not read this warning may need them .. but then what is the use to write warnings for them ? They can't see much difference between the marlboro man or the warning .. except that one looks recognizable ...
Then there was this recent debate (Delhi Times , some months back) that cigarette boxes should carry bigger warning signs .. like in other countries .. but I think it is no use having the warning .. nobody ever reads what is written on the box .. the color and design of the box confirms the brand .. that is all what people see ... (ofcourse I read the warning that is why I am writing this article .. and ofcourse you read it t.. that is why you know what I am talking about .. but does it ever make a difference weather it was written or not ?)
A good idea is to include pornographic pictures/dirty jokes on the box too .. that ways at least 50% of the people will see the box .. and at least 50% of them will then read the warning .. good idea ? So elevate me to the post of Tobacco minister or whoever decides this .. I'll then have other innovative ideas like this and then I'll make this country a good place to live in ... jai hind ... (And I'll make good use of one of those red light VIP cars given to me.. that zip through the traffic .. )
So all warnings should be removed from the boxes (since no one will like my other suggestion) and the boxes should be left blank .. that will save so much ink (owing to the amount of cigarette boxes produced per year .. must be in billions .. ) .. and that will save so many trees or some other naural resource ..
But I guess I am the only one concerned about the country and the environment ..

2005-05-30T14:34:00.000+05:30

"A blog is as good as its last post"

Read this on a blog when I started blogging . That was the day I started reading the second last post too.

Cultural Shit

2005-05-29T12:58:00.000+05:30

I have been playing a lot of guitar lately and I really feel sad that all this time I didn't learn much on my accoustic guitar. I mean .. it's like 6 years since I have an accoustic .. and I learnt as much as a slow begginer would learn in ... say 6 months ? I mean .. such a waste ..
And now that I remember ... they used to teach us nothing in school. Not that my school was bad .. but there was this whole cultural shit that always comes on from God knows where. So , our instrumental teacher used to be a sitar player who taught us to play Sa Re Ga Ma and Ragas. I was taught to play the guitar on one string .. and I wondered when do people use the rest of the 5 .. ok ... my school really sucked at this .... but then I don't understand why do we give so much importance to the culture thing. I mean .. what is culture ? A way of living that an era of people invented some time back ? Right ... then why do we want to adopt it right now ? I mean ... if everybody was following cultures all this time .. then we would have had Harappan culture now ... Right ?
I think everybody should be free to do what he she wants to do ..
And ... when I say cultural shit ... I do not mean to say that all this Indian Classical and all that is bad ... what I want to say is that harping about culture and forcing people to follow it is . As for Indian classical music is concerned .. I think it is wonderful .. I really love the songs with classical touch and I think singing it does wonders to your voice. But please .. let me do what I want to ...
In the college .. my principal is a big time Indian Culture freak .. so we have all these spic macay programs in the college. I don't mind them .. infact .. I got to hear Pt. Hari Prasad Chaurasiya through one of these (and he is wonderful) .. but then .. what happens is .. he'll give huge sponsorship for the Spic Macay programs .. and shit if we want to do something like a rock competition or sth. Not only that ... he would actually put on strong terms like time limits and all that on any such programs in the college .. now this is shit. Like .. why ?

2005-05-25T00:19:00.000+05:30

Bomb blasts hit two theatres in Delhi. Both the halls were showing Sunny Deol's 'Jo Bole Sonihal" ... one mans crusade against presumably everyone who happens to say anything against India/Indians ..
There have been lots of speculation as to who was responsible for the blast .. it could be the terrorists (always responsible for all the blasts .. life is a huge Diwali for them) , it could be one of the million other groups who love to go kaboom now and then .. but I'd say it was a terribly bored viewer who decided to bomb the halls so that such kind of crap does not hit the halls again.
So the people who got realy bored seeing the movie , went to the loo .. and went kaboom. Another reason one should never go out to see such crap.
In the same incident .. I saw Aaj Tak , the news channel cover the thing up. The reporter who was covering it up almost went to the ICU with a person who was being taken to the hospital for some first aid. The reporter was asking all kinds of questions .. like where you were when the bomb happned to blast (since he was the only one there who didn't know that the blast happned in the loo) .. then they were interviewing this other person who had all his hair burnt and all that .. One of the questions was :
"What movie were you watching ?"
"This movie starring Dharaminder's son .."
C'mon .. can't you see the posters .. I mean first the reporter didn't know where the blast took place , and then he doesn't know which movie was playing. For finding the first piece of info , he followed a patient to the casuality ward tormenting him like hell .. and for the second ... well he could have picked up a newspaper or asked someone else , since he was the only one who didn't know which movie was playing ... and they say that Aaj Tak is the 'Sabse tez channel'
My take on all this is ... never go out to watch this kinda crap. You never know ..

My New Baby

2005-05-23T23:48:00.000+05:30

Johnson AXL Double Cutaway AS-200

Solid Alder Body
One Piece Maple Neck
Rosewood Neck Stripe
Kluson-Stlye Tuning Machines
3 AXL lo-noise EMGPickups
2 Tone and 1 Volume Control
5 Position Pickup Selector
Fulcrum Bridge
Fender Guitar Strings

Bought this today (though in a different color). I am super happy.
Ta da da da daa .... I am loving it ...

The past two days

2005-05-21T21:31:00.000+05:30

I have been very busy these two days to blog. Came back after my last paper and wrote the last post. Then went off to see an old school freind who has come from Pune. Spent the evening with him , and then came back home. Burned some CD's and then off to the hostel for DP (Daru party).
This time it was really fun. This time it was the maximum we had ever drunk. We went out to get a bottle of whisky (750ml) and a beer , but due to the unavailablity of beer , we bought a litre of RC for the four of us. This was the maximum I had ever drunk.And I was like really DRUNK. But it was fun.
Started off with a Patiyala + Ludhiyana (read really large) peg , and some rock. Finally when we ended , we were all lying on the floor and screaming. A couldn't stop laughing , and J became all serious. I was quiet as usual.
But unlike other times , we were over drunk. So much so , that for the first time , I had troubles walking straight. We were so drunk that we couldn't go to our favorite after-drink-peeing spot. So we just lied there. G went off to some one elses room and slept. J and A went off to sleep too. But I just couldn't sleep. This was due to the heat and those darned mosquitoes (I'll write a full post about them someday). Now I am pretty used to sleeping in the comforts of my home , AC and all. This was like hell. So I went out on a walk at 2 in the night. But my head was still heavy. So I decided to lie down in my car. But suddenly a thought struck my mind .. I could drive home , since I had the keys to the main door. So I took off for home. The guard at the gate asked me if I intended to come back , since we are not allowed inside the college at odd times. I said no and drove home.
Reached home safely , driving a bit slower.Outside the door , I realized that my father also bolts the door from inside , and it was like shit. I couldn't go back to the hostel , couldn't go home , nowhere else , I was in big crap. I decided to sleep in the car. But that has other problems attached to it. If I were to be seen by my grandfather sleeping in my car (since he wakes up at 4 in the morning) .. it would have meant really huge pile of dinosaur shit. So I decided to be brave and ring up and wake up my father (since my mother was not here). After waking him up I realized I must be smelling of alcohol. And this was like really big shit .. Shit shit shit. Where are the dinosaurs when you want them to eat you up ? but I had little time to think .. my father was already opening the door .. and I was like really really scared. I knew he wouldn't say anything .. but still .. anyways .. my father opened the door .. I went behind a few steps to avoid his sensitive nose. I said sorry for bothering him so late in the night and told him to go away to sleep .. and that I'd lock the door. And to my surprise .. he did. Seeing him enter his room .. I entered the house. Phew ... close.
The next day .. I woke up to find that my AC was at it's highest intensity and I was shivering. In the bathroom I discovered an open toothpaste .. I had forgotten to close it the night before. But what surprised me was that my father didn't wake me .. didn't even come to switch off the AC .. When I woke up , he had already left for his office. I was kinda scared that he actually did smell the alcohol and dind't say anything. But later the maid told me that he decided not to wake me up as I had slept late. Thank god.
After that some freind dropped by and then I left for Ambala in the afternoon. For the first time without my father .. which meant that I could drive at my speed. I found out that my car could run at 140 km/hr.
Came back today with mom and brother. And then I played badminton after ages today. All my body is paining .. but the two days after my exams have been good.
Seems like I'll enjoy a lot in these holidays.

Over

2005-05-19T13:42:00.000+05:30

I'll be reappearing for the same paper the next year. Yes .. I am definitely flunking in todays paper .. and this is not like all the people saying that I'm expecting a suppli ... I don't say just because I had a bad paper .. this is the second time I'm saying this .. the last time I said this , I escaped a flunk by a narrow margin of 4 marks .. but not this time ..
anyways .. the papers are over ...

Today I finished the paper 1.5 hr earlier than the stipulated time .. and the 1.5 hrs that I did sit .. I did not have much to write .. so I just sat there for some time observing our invigilator. And he was one big ... asshole ...
Here is a conversation between me and the #$^$& invigilator :

In : Do you have a phone with you here ?
Me : No sir. (Since I know that phones are not allowed)
In : You have kept it in the bag ?
Me : Yes.
In : Can I make an important call ?
Me : (Taken back..)Ok ... (and may the phone fuck you in your ear ..)

I spend some useless minutes on the phone turning it ON. and guess what ? He dials up an STD and talks for 12 minutes. Urgent call ? Yeah sure .. this is what you get for being good ...
And then to my surprise .. he made it sure that I deleted the number off from my cell (Though I dunno why .. except for if he called up one of those raunchy phonelines ..). And then I noticed something really awful .. the invigilator was trying to look down girls' shirts .. really .. every girl who came for a supplementary sheet had to sign somewhere bending really low .. and this old bastard .... he began swaying to get a better look ... my God ...

Anyways .. the papers are over ...
Party tonight ..
&
Beer

Exams

2005-05-11T20:47:00.000+05:30

Exams end on the 19th .. so no new posts till then ...

And thanx in advance for all the best-of-lucks you are going to drop in my comments box .. (but now that I have written this .. you may decide against the best-of-lucks .. but at least you thought about it .. so thanx anyways).
:)

Mallika Sherawat can eat shit

2005-05-05T12:04:00.000+05:30

Mallika Sherawat is going to the Cannes festival. Ok. Great. But why do I get to see what the heck she is likely to wear there ? I mean big fucking deal that she is going to the stupid festival. Ok .. the festival may not be that stupid .. but all the phoneys are sure to drop by there wearing their bright flashy dresses .. and our very own Mallika will be going there wearing a specially designed one. Right .. but why cover it in the media so much. The same when Ash went the last time. First they spent pages on how the dresses are going to be .. and then they spent pages and pages on how much the dresses sucked. I say these things look great on Fashion TV and in fashion journals .. but spare the newspaper please. Delhi times (and all the Times Publications for that matter) are becoming crappy day by day. Stupid people .. can't stop showing their own advertisements and promoting their own brands in the newspaper.
And while we are still fresh on Mallika Sherawat .. here is what she had to say in some of her interviews (given here along with what I think about her comments) :

M : "Men talk to my breasts"
IJ : Ya .. like .. hi there you lil' left one .. I know that right one has been getting all the attention lately ... U have my sympathies ..

M : "I was like Viagra for bollywood"
IJ : You bet ... old people with erectile dysfunction used to jerk off to your photos till they put their spectacles on ..

M : "I live like a nun"
IJ : And I .. I live like like Hugh Hefner.

M : "I want a man who has more balls than I do"
IJ : Catch hold of superman .. maybe they have 3 balls there at Krypton.

Does she think she is a really talented actress ? Beautiful ? Sexy ? Fuck off. She is just a boob show .. who'd soon end up forgotten. But I'd sure remember those funny interviews for some time.
And to think that murder became the biggest hit of last year. Just shows how sex-deprived our public is .. I say .. DD should start some late night Raunchy shows for the public. Bleh to moral policing.
And about murder .. it was such a hoplessly sucking film that I decided to leave it mid-way. For a long time .. I'd not watch it .. and then one day some freind gets it on CD and we set to watch it .. the first CD seemed 3 hrs long ....... I never saw the second CD.

Finger

2005-05-02T01:26:00.000+05:30

I have decided I am going to be the real me from now on .. even on the blog .. which means I would be going a lot of fuck you and stuff ... which in turn means that if you can't fuckin stand a fuck in every other fuckin sentence .. then suck my dick and plead me to stop it or fuckin stop coming here .. I am kinda sick carrying this nice person image .. people tend to take liberties that ways .. and then they tend to be really sick. So from now on .. middle finger of my left foot to anyone who tries to be very smart with me (get it .. I am and always will be smarter than you can ever dream to be).. and ppl who know me are in for a lot of surprises .. I am not as good I was yesterday .. so eat shit and get lost ... and stop eating my head ...
Man I am pissed off ... people can really get on your nerves sometimes ..
I hate stupid people ..
And I absolutely HATE exams ..

Agrrrrh ....

2005-04-29T16:42:00.000+05:30

I just hate last days of the semester. And today was the last day .. the final day of teaching .. and I had to submit 15 assignments of 1 subject , 5 of some other subject , and 3 of a third subject. Besde this .. there were 2 practical files to be submitted .. And you know what do we do in all these assignments and files ? COPY ... copy from books , copy from freinds , copy from old files .. copy copy copy .. for marks .. just for them marks .
For three days now I have been sleeping at 3 in the night and getting up at 7 in the morning . For a lazy person like me .. this is hell. I mean I need my quota of 8 hrs of sleep everyday ..
And on top of all this .. a last minute scare ... I am short of attendance. Some new rule takes it out of teachers' hands to give attendance .. and if 75% of attendance is compulsory .. then about half of my class gets to miss the exams .. now, not giving the exams is not that bad .. but having to give it the next year is bad ... Anyways .. so the last minute scare .. that I'll be falling short of attendance ...so what do I do ? I run to get a fake medical certificate .. when I come back .. there is news that the list of detainees would be put shortly. Finally .. someone comes with the news that dean has shifted the limit to 50% attendance. Phew .. what a sigh of relief ...
Imagine .. 10 of my classmates had a medical certificate from the same doctor .. an orthopaedics doctor .. so everybody was supposed to be having some bone injury !

So .. I had thought I won't be posting before my exams .. but I don't think that'll be quite possible .. :)

And one thing more ... have you heard Indian Ocean ? (the band) .. well if you haven't .. then I'd say you are seriously missing something .... their music is pure ecstacy. It is difficult to classify them into a genre .. but they could be called Fusion in some sense . They have classical lyrics (not always) playing with electric guitars which that Sushmit guy plays really well. Their latest album is the soundtracks for the movie 'Black Friday' .. and it is awsome .. must buy ... If you intend to download their music .. then I'd suggest the following tracks : Bhor, Kaun, Ma Rewa, Torrent, Bandeh, Karam bhap ke, Badshah in jail.

Nothing new

2005-04-26T12:17:00.001+05:30

I got nothing new to post. Papers are coming and I want to do well this time (like always ..).

And I found some other stuff I had begun to write .. like this :
Things I really hate :
1. People who can't stop shaking while sitting down .. they always have to be in the vibration mode .
2. Stupid yaari-dosti sms forwards.
3. Forwards asking you to forward it to more people.
4. Explaining a joke.
5. People I have to explain a joke to.
6. SRK type high drama movies.
7. Indian cricket team putting up a miserable show.
8. Buying clothes for myself or rather shopping in general.
9.Religious rallies that block the traffic.
10.Music that becomes popular only becoz it is from a stupid popular movie .
11.People who think rock (Or English music as some choose to call it) should be listened to because it is fashionable to do so.
12.Doing all the college work just because I want some marks.

And I found a few good quotes :

"If you came here to see spandex, eye makeup, and the words 'Oh baby' in every fuckin' song, this ain't the fuckin' band."
---- James from Metallica , on one of their early shows.

Life is a highway, i wanna ride it, all night long.
N if ur comin ma way, i wanna drive it all night long
---- Tom Cochrane

So all this makes up another post .. :) ..
Won't be posting for some time now .. papers are coming ..

Raghu Romeo

2005-04-23T19:17:00.000+05:30

Just saw Raghu Romeo. Heard of this movie ? Seen it anyone ?
*ing : Vijay Raaz, Sadia Siddiqui, Maria Goretti, Saurabh Shukla
Raghu Romeo was a small budget film made in 2003. It had a quiet release , showed in a few halls and then was forgotten. I wanted to see it then .. but it was not showing at any hall near me .. so I didn't see it. Some days back ... a freind got me this movie on an original Video CD .. saying that this was a shitty movie. I took it from him .. and saw it after a few days. Turned out that the movie kicked major butt. I mean from the acting to the plot .. everything was really good. Very original story (Atleast I have not seen anything on the same lines before).. and good acting by Vijay Raaz and Sadia Siddiqui. Anyone who loves watching different and closer to reality movies (as in ... little of masala .. pretty much like Ram Gopal Verma films) .. this is definitely a movie to watch.

Visit the official Raghu Romeo Web site.
Here is something from this web site :

Why should one go and see Raghu Romeo?

Good question....
and a tough one to answer.

When there are so many things asking for your attention- besides work and spouse and children and commuting - just in entertainment terms, there are enough options at home. There is television for practically no money, or you could hire a dvd from a neighbourhood library or browse the internet for 10 bucks an hour - then why pay 100 bucks a ticket and go and watch Raghu Romeo - especially when there are other blockbusters running - guaranteed value for money kind of blockbusters with stars and all that...

Well- I told you it was a tough question for me to crack!
I don't know really-
but you must not watch Raghu Romeo because you have heard somewhere that the director raised the money on the internet and that sounds like an innovative way of collecting funds.

You must not watch Raghu Romeo because it has been to 15 film festivals all over the world.
You must not watch Raghu Romeo because you liked Rajat Kapoor in Dil Chahta Hai!
You must not watch Raghu Romeo because the critics tell you it is a very good film.
You must not watch Raghu Romeo because you want to support independent cinema!

No! Dont watch it for any of these wrong reasons.

Watch it because it is fun.
Watch it because it might move you, it might touch you, it most definitely will make you laugh.
Watch it because it is a film about the crazy times we live in, because it is a film about us - real people.
Watch it because it is about love.
Watch it because of the sterling performances of the actors, for the camerawork, for the art direction.
Watch it for its raw energy, for its way of looking.
Watch it because it has an original voice.
Watch it because you might find that a film can have a soul.
And most definitely watch it because your neighbour tells you that she saw it and she loved it!

Rajat Kapoor

-----

And I totally echo his sentiments .. it is more like I could have said all this myself ... and the same for any movie .... he becomes my fav director after Ram Gopal Verma.
And for anyone who has seen this movie and liked it .. I think there could not have been a better ending to the movie.
For anyone who has seen the movie and didn't like it .. tell me why .
I loved the movie.

Blogger #%$^*$$^

2005-04-23T19:01:00.000+05:30

Blogger fucked my blog .. well .. almost. I signed for a new blog .. I changed it's template ... and voila .. the template of this blog gets altered too .. and I lose all my precious customization of that template ..
For a second .. I thought I also lost my haloscan comments .. but then I got them back ...
But the favorites section is gone .. so is the playlist @ last post section ... and I don't remember what else ... God ... sometimes you can hate all this technology ....

Siddharth

2005-04-23T13:50:00.000+05:30

Read about Vijay Mallya's son anyone ? Do you know he gets an airline on his 18th birthday ? Wow ! I'd like to swap places with that guy ... I mean ... my dad never got me even a picture book with airplanes and that guy gets a whole fucking airline. And on top of that , he is the son of a man who owns the second largest breweries in the world .. talk about all the booze you can have at your work place ... wow .. I'd love to be a manager at a brewery one day .. or probably own one (one of those good ones ..) ... but the best is if I get to swap places with this guy .. Siddharth . *wide eyed*.
Ok .. back to studying .. papers are coming ..

Losing my Religion

2005-04-20T21:47:00.000+05:30

I am completely hooked on to this song these days (see the playlist on the right .. it is right out of my Winamp). It is called 'Losing my Religion' by R.E.M. . Losing my religion is a Southern expression meaning "At my wit's end," as if things were going so bad you could lose your faith in God. Here are the lyrics of the song :

Oh, life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no, I've said too much
I set it up

That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight, I'm
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool, fool
Oh no, I've said too much
I set it up
Consider this
Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

But that was just a dream
That was just a dream

But that was just a dream
Try, cry, why try?
That was just a dream
Just a dream, just a dream
Dream

Heard this anyone ? Have you seen this video ? It was directed by Tarsem Singh and it is good. If you got high speed net connection .. I'd suggest a download.
Now there are different interpretations of the song. I don't know which is the correct one .. what do you think ?

5 really stinky ads on TV

2005-04-18T23:43:00.000+05:30

Here is a list of 5 ads that I think should be put off the air immediately if these companies want to sell their products :

1. Harpic : The makers of this ad thought that it would be fun for everybody to have look down dirty shit pots while having their dinner. To top that .. an equally stupid Aman Verma .... he helps you have a better look .. and then cleans it up for you as well .. really great ad ..

2. Super Splendor Plus : This is the ad wherein a guy , clad in black , is jumping up and down , while other guys around him are chanting some kinda mantras . Now , I am at a complete loss to understand what the makers of this ads wanted to show. The connection between Splendor and the divine ? Then ? And like why is that guy jumping around so much and then finally passes through the fire to get hold of the new engine. Why must he hold the engine ? Will that make him feel that the bike is good ? How many of us can recognize good engines from normal ones by looking at them ? And like ... don't people know that splendor sucks ... (The last Splendor ad was really good .. remember the Mohan Kapoor ad .. blind act ?)

3. Rasna : The new Rasna ad with Hritik Roshan. Now this ad is right at the top among the really sucking ads (along with the harpic ad). This ad wants to capitalize on the success of Koi mil gaya. First I don't know how that sick movie ever became a hit .. I mean .. the movie was so god-damn bad ... that I place it with the likes of "Jaani Dushman" , "Mastee" and Mithun-da films. And whoever said that this was a copy of Forest Gump .. eat shit .. this movie is nowhere close to that classic. And now this ad .. with Hritik Roshan doing his kid act again. You know what .. Hritik Roshan really sucks .. and Hritik Roshan doing this kid act sucks even more. And on top of that .. you have masala dialogues like .. "Yeh sachcha hai .. isliye isse peena chahiye (over coke and all)" ... Really ? Sachcha ? What is the difference between coke and Rasna except for the carbon dioxide dissolved (and the water ofcourse) ? Both of them have preservatives .... only Rasna is a Soft Drink Concentrate ... sachcha ?

4. Surf Excel : "2 bucket paani ab rozaana hai bachana.." Yeah ? And what if I use only one bucket of water evryday ? And how did Shabana Azmi ever land into this ? She is an actress who was careful with her film selection .. then why this ad all of a sudden ?

5. Pepsi , bubbly grind : This is the ad wherein Amitabh Bachchan suddenly crops out of the stadium floor and starts to swing the bat. First of all ... whatever Amitabh Bachchan is saying does not match his lip movement .. it is taken out of the video , wherein he is singing. Next .. whatever he says is pretty unintelligible as well .. Something like .."Match ka bada sth lagaayein .. to do the bubbly grind" .. and then notice the players .. some of them look so ill at ease while dancing that you get the feeling that drinking Pepsi must make you constipated. And above everything .. India lose the series.

Some other ads that didn't make it to the top 5 :
6. TATA Indicom : With Ganguly trying to sing a copy of Breathless.
7. LG CDMA phones : Every hand wants one .. really ? That shitty phone?
8. Extra Premium Petrol with extra additives : First .. get this straight. Even if you use this petrol .. you'll end up spending the same amt. of money on petrol. And the ad . I am talking about this Yuvraj Singh ad wherein he is asking directions from Vijay Raaz on the petrol pump ("right hand side , red building ..").
9. DD Direct plus : Showing the elite crew of 4th empire ... this ad sucks big time ..
10.Dabur sona chandi Chawanprash : With Ganguly clad in dhoti , jumping up and down with a sword ..

Here's a list of some really good ones :
1. All the Hutch ads.
2. Raymonds Suitings : The school principal series .. they are really wonderful.
3. Rin , Ultra White : The "Maine poochha kya ?". The little boy goes "Mujha poetry aati hai .. 'yellow yellow , dirty fellow' " :).
4. Fevicol : all the ads.
5. Ambuja Cement : The Boman Irani ad .. with a wall between the two brothers that is difficult to break.
6. Reliance Ad : Again , Boman Irani is too good. ("kuti ko phone lagaao ad ..STD pe ..")

Lots of others I can't remember as of now ..

Yaahoooo ..

2005-04-17T15:06:00.000+05:30

India is 94/6 ..
doesn't it make you want to party ?
Yahooo ..
India will lose again ...
India will lose again ...
Do the bubbly grind everyone ..
Have some Pepsi/Servo /TATA Indicom/Mayur Suitings/MRF Tyres/Victor GLX or any of the million products our players endorse ..
Finger to them

What a fucking day ..

2005-04-16T02:50:00.000+05:30

Last night .. last minute decision of the class .. no mass bunk .. 2 hrs of frikkin lab today ... being streched to 2.5 hrs by a "tharki" teacher. Ass hole .. keeps staring at the girls with open mouth and thinks that no one notices. True .. a lot of people do not notice .. but then , I do .. and I just can't help feeling an urge to show him the finger .. "Beti paas aa jaao .. idhar baitho .." bahen ka **** ... can't help gaping at chicks .. and then showers marks on them . A girls' simple formula .. give him a smile .. talk to him for a minute .. and you get at least 2 extra marks in your internal paper . SOB. And talk about showers .. talk to him for a minute .. and you'd be showered with 2 litres of saliva .. fucking son of a bitch .. almost gave me a bath today with his oral pissings ...
Then I come home .. and India has a meagre total ...still , the hopeful Indian fan .. I patiently wait for Pakistan's innings .. 2nd over .. Balaji on the balling .. Afridi on the strike .. 23 runs from 1 over .. 3rd over maiden instills some hope .. 4th over .. welcome Kumble with 23 more runs from a single over .. I shut the TV after that ...
Tried to sleep .. the Bhajan-kirtan aunty gang start shouting their bhajans at the top of their voices .. then the temple .. and then someone gets irritated and turns on his Music system .. full volume .. song ? Some punjabi number .. wow .. just what I had wanted.
Got up .. called up the guy whom I had given a speaker to repair .. tells me that it's still not done. Asshole..
Next .. I go to the magazine vendor to get a copy of some magazine I had ordered .. another sob ... tells me .. "Arrey woh sales man naahin na aaya hai .."
Back to home .. think of playing some computer game .. first , 007 Nightfire or sth like that ... some freind got it for me .. said it was really nice .. took me an hour to find a way to get the stupid doors to open .. finally when they do open .. it takes another hour to reach a place where you perform some kinda stunt using some gadget .. guess what ... Mr. Bond gets killed performing the stunt. Again I reach that place .. again death. Bull crap .. I'd rather not play this game .. I was better off playing Arcanoid and Icy Towers.
Some freind drops in and brings Mortal Kombat 4. Gets me hooked for some time .. but again .. while he was playing .. the thing seemed really fine .. but when I play the game .. well .. it turns out that I'll have to remember a sequence of buttons to make some special move .. and there are different buttons for different players .. after sometime I get really frustrated using only one player and using only one sequence of buttons .. I press [ctrl]+F4.
Next I go online .. download some tabs .. try playing them on my accoustic .. curse the sky that I don't have an electric. I head towards my father's room to talk about buying an electric. Find him watching some movie .. Khalnayak .. Sanjay Dutt ... I sit down .. watch some scenes .. and boy he acted well even then... I start watching the movie. But as soon as I start enjoying the movie .. a stupid song crops up from nowhere ... I get up and leave. I remember half way to my room - 'the electric' .. but talking about anything with my father while he is watching TV is hopeless , so I decide against going to him and leave to get some ice cream. For the first time I get Cassatta for myself ... and the ice cream turns out to be really shitty ..
Finally I settle down on my computer and have another go at Mortal Kombat .. still .. the result the same .. I decide that I'd never lay my hands on any complex game again.
And so I decide to write a post as an end to a totally wasted day ..

About God and prayers

2005-04-13T23:12:00.000+05:30

Navratrein are here. I don't know what is the concept behind the festivities , but the 9 day long pooja can really drive you nuts. Consider this .. I have a temple behind my house and there is a kirtan everyday in front of my house. The temple has the pujaari or someone reciting prayers on a mic attached to a speaker put up on the top of the temple .. and his voice isn't exactly like Anup Jalota (a famous aarti singer) .. but still he goes on with the bhajans , esp in the evening. Then there is this group of Aunties that gathers in the evenings to do Bhajan-kirtan .. reciting bhajans on the mic , with a dholak-chammach providing the beats. And that is absolute cacophony. Aunties with their shrill voice , performing pooja ... and since their are actually praying .. no one can go and tell them to shut up or to lower the volume at least. And I go absolutely crazy .. listening to 2 sources of noise at the same time .. interfering destructively in my ears. The place where I lived earlier , there people used to put up small tents which housed a cassete player and a large speaker (remember Hyderabad Blues ? Just like that ..) .. and that thing played aartis all night long. I hate these bhajan singing festivals. And I don't understand that why must these things be done on the microphone. You want to pray .. good .. you should .. pray at your place quietly .. or sing Bhajans in your house ... but not on the mic please. And I can't think of any other reason but a show-off. All this comes across as a show off to me. Why ring bells in the temple ? Do u think God is a little deaf ? Or you u need to draw his attention ... like a little child draws the attention of his mother by wailing ? Why sing bhajans on the microphone .. because God up there is not able to hear your calls from down here ? The only reason which I can think off is show-off. People want other people to see how devout they are. Is there some other reason for that ? Only a show off can drive people to do Jaagrans. And that is another thing I've never been able to understand. Does god listen to you more in the night. Why can't you pray in the day ? Is overnight singing equal to flooding the God's mailbox with request letters so that he realises you are really needy ? Why ?
Actually the whole concept of going to temples and praying seems wierd sometimes.I mean people spend valuable time and money trying to appease a stone idol in which they think resides their omnipresent god. Nothing wrong with that. People need to visualize their god .. but what is strange is the fact that .... God is omnipresent , but is 'more' omnipresent in the stone idols and around the temple , which is why everybody removes their shoes there , never speak one bad word when in 10 m radius of the temple , always put on a benevolent expression while in the temple and will try to bribe the stone god by offering money while the same people will actually do really awful things while they are not near the temple , because God's spy cameras and microphones are only fitted in and around the temple. And then , why try to appease the the god ? Has he got a really large ego that needs to be regularily fed by millions of mortals because they think that the thread of their lives is in his hands ? Then what good is such a god ? Praying to God is not bad ... it helps to strengthen your hope. Money donated for the upkeep of the temple isn't bad either .. but donating millions of rupees , like in a temple in South India (Which collects truck loads of booty every year) .. well that is kinda strange.Why not spend the same time and money trying to help a human being in distress ?
When I was a kid , my mother used to make me sit at all the poojas that took place in our house and I sat along and prayed to God almighty so that he may help me to get all that I wanted , or if I needed nothing then I would simply pray because my mother was praying .But my family was never very religious , except dadiji (My grandmother) , my father is a firm non-believer and my mother seldom goes to temples and we have never had a big pooja or a hawan or anything like that ... we only had a pooja on festivals like Diwali ,in which my mother used to sing the aarti and I used to stand closing my eyes , hands folded in prayer , waiting for the parsaad. Nobody forced their beliefs on me which allowed me to develop my own thought process in this matter ....
When I became 14 , like all teenagers , I guess I tried to be different from the crowd and started believing that God does not exist ... that it is only a hope that foolish people need , because it is one hope that is never going to fail them. I had so many heated arguments on this subject and well , it always ended in something like 'you go your way , I'll go mine' . But I never realized that though I never believed in God , I always sub-consciously believed in practical magic .... miracles that will happen that will save me from the current crisis , will help me pass the next exam and will help me in getting the girl I had a crush on. I didn't realise then that while I was running away from one God , I was submitting to the other , only difference was that I never prayed to the God I had invented but then I always thought about him. And it is only when I came to college that I started thinking on these lines and found that I had actually invented a source of eternal hope for myself.
--
And one last thing .. Umm.. this post was only my views .... I may have hurt someone with what I have said. Well I am sorry if that is the case. It is just that sometimes all this becomes really unbearable.

Chocolat

2005-04-12T23:50:00.001+05:30

Just finished reading Chocolat. Great book. I amlost feel sad that it ended. Sometimes the ecstacy of beauty is so much that you never want it to end. It has been a long time since I felt like that after reading a book. The last book I read , The Fountainhead , I didn't feel like this after reading it. That time I felt different. Filled with new energy. Other books I see lying here .. Grishams , Ludlums , Paulo Cohelo , Richard Bach , The Celestine Prophecy , Maugham.. none left with me wishing so much that it ever ended. But next I happen to see To kill a Mocking Bird .. well , that book was different. I remember this book called toto chan I read once. Then ... The catcher in the Rye , but I don't think after reading those the feeling was so strong. Or it could be that I feel so good after reading this book, that the memory of the last one has faded. Yet I remember I felt the same reading Ruskin Bond books when I was young. "The room on the roof". I don't know how many nights I dreamed about having a room like that , living in a place like that , having a life like that. This book , Chocolat, I can't imagine myself in it , but it was so much pleasure reading it , that I want to read more of it. About the little girl Anouk , her mother , about the beautiful Chocolate Parlour , about everything ... I want to live that book again.
I think I dream a lot. I think I repeat the words "I wish .." very often. I don't want to. I know it is dangerous , but I can't help it. I wish I was in a place like that. I wish I would one day ...
Some friend brought this book from the library. I'll have to return it to her tomorrow. But I don't want to. It is like parting with a ... I don't know what ... but I feel very bad returning this book. That is the reason I always buy my books. So that I'll never have to return them. So that I can re-live them anytime I want. It is like having photographs of the moments you enjoyed , so that you can remember them whenever you want. Wish I could sample all the times I felt really good ...
A quote from the book :
"Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive"
And suddenly I felt like writing a post.

I think I need a small break from blogging

2005-04-09T18:39:00.000+05:30

--do--

Lot of things

2005-04-05T01:27:00.000+05:30

About 2 months back .. I didn't know what Euthanasia was .. and while talking to some freind I actually asked her that if it was the joint currency of Europe and Asia .. well I thought so that time (And u would too if u didn't know what this word meant). But well .. after this terri case .. I guess everyone knows what Euthanasia is supposed to mean. I think it should be legalised .. what about u ?
Anybody read a book called chocolat ? How is it ?
I want to read Atlas Shrugged.
I want to own an IPod also ( i.e. if we are talking about wanting someting ) ... and for that matter .. I want to own a Gibson/Fender (hohner/any good comapny would do too . ok .. I'l settle for good old Indian Givson .. buy me one) electric guitar .. and I want an effects panel for that guitar ... and I want a 7.1 speaker set for my computer (2.1 would do) .. I want a Bose Music System (Sony would do fine too .. the 7000 watts one that is .. ok 3000 watts would do .)... I want a really fast (and cheap) internet connection at my home .... I want to buy lots of books , which I never saw in the second hand books market (one of them being Eragon , heard about it ?) .. and I want a lot of other things .. where is santa ? (Santa Clause that is .. lest you think the Punjabi name santa ..)
I'll have to hang a really long stocking for the list to fit into ... Or maybe I can roll the list and slip into a normal one .. that ways I'll cross out the really long stocking on my wish list ...

Ordinary World

2005-04-02T21:56:00.000+05:30

I am not original anymore . First I posted that pic that I didn't click , and now the lyrics of this song. But I really liked these lyrics ...

Ordinary World

Came in from a rainy Thursday
On the avenue
Thought I heard you talking softly

I turned on the lights, the TV
And the radio
Still I can't escape the ghost of you

What has happened to it all?
Crazy, some are saying
Where is the life that I recognize?
Gone away

But I won't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
Somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way
To the ordinary world
I will learn to survive

Passion or coincidence
Once prompted you to say
"Pride will tear us both apart"
Well now pride's gone out the window
Cross the rooftops
Run away
Left me in the vacuum of my heart

What is happening to me?
Crazy, some'd say
Where is my friend when I need you most?
Gone away

But I won't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
Somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way
To the ordinary world
I will learn to survive

Papers in the roadside
Tell of suffering and greed
Here today, forgot tomorrow
Ooh, here besides the news
Of holy war and holy need
Ours is just a little sorrow
It's all gone away

And I don't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
Somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way
To the ordinary world
I will learn to survive

Every one
Is my world, I will learn to survive
Any one
Is my world, I will learn to survive
Any one
Is my world
Every one
Is my world

-------------Duran Duran

Astronomical Discovery

2005-04-02T21:18:00.000+05:30

They finally found water on mars ....

Wasted efforts

2005-04-01T01:55:00.000+05:30

Why must I write the frikkin Lab Manual/file if the only thing we do in it is copy from the book ? Won't it be easier if I just write the relevent page numbers (from the book) along with the observations ? Or rather submit a xerox of the book ?
Never got the point why we make this stupid thing , in the school ... and I'll never get it in the college ...
Why must I make this f***ing thing ?
Oh yes .. the marks ... !@#$%^&*&^%$#@! !@#$ !@#$%^

The cliched movies

2005-03-29T15:18:00.000+05:30

I wanted to write about this since a long time ... here it goes ....
Most of the popular hindi movies are really crap (A lot of hollywood movies too ... but we'll talk about that later). They show situations that so far from reality that if you are not dreaming while seeing the movie .. you'll leave after the first 15 minutes. Though there is another way of jhelo-ing the movie , make fun of it right through it.
So why do I find them so bad ? Well .. ever heard anybody in real life say things like "Main tumse itna pyar karta hoon jitna gagan dharti se karta hai .. bhanwra phoolon se karta hai .. pahaar aur vaadiyan gawah hain etc. etc. " ?? The people who say such things in real life actually never came out of the last SRK movie they saw. Well if someone was to say sth like that to me .. I wud tell him to f off into all the pahaar and bageeche he has been talking about. And this is not the only thing that is far-from-real in hindi movies , there are other things that can seem really odd .. like the hero and heroine start singing in surround Dolby sound all of a sudden .. and every hero in every movie (almost) can sing. And then extras appear out of thin air and start dancing in synchro with the actors. I don't say that good movies are not made .. I mean .. some of them are so good that you can forgive the hero and heroine sing in really loud voices , but most of them have cliched song-dance routine ... hero-heroine , extras , some exotic location , dupatta flying , words like dil,pyar,muhobbat,jaan,jigar, etc in every 2nd line .. and a song is made. Otherwise there is this new trend , item no.s in clubs .. almost every villian goes to a dance bar now and then .. and every dance bar he goes to has this pretty chick who belts out original numbers and dances to them with a lot of ooomph (read really small clothes and lewd guestures). Yet we have been so used to seeing all this stuff .. that it doesn't seem odd anymore. For example .. the songs ... that every hero sings .. it is like a part and parcel of almost every hindi movie .. and so we hardly find it odd ..
But not all the popular movies are bad .. recently 'Black' was good .. most of the Ram Gopal Verma films are good .. a lot of other movies are good .. some comedies are good too .. but what I am really aginst is SRK type of movies .. movies like Kuchh kuchh hota hai , Main hoon na etc. etc. .. and what is more surprising is the fact that thet go on to become big hits. When I see these movies ( I don't now .. but u do get to see some scenes now and then ) .. I can see right through them .. not one second can I associate with the movie .. the perfectionist hero , the extra-heavy dialogues , the emotions , the drama .. what about the real life. I am not against SRK .. I think he is a good actor (I really don't think so .. but since I am no authority on it .. I have no right to comment on his acting ) .. but most of his movies are sick. The last SRK movie that I found good was Ashoka , or probably Swades. But SRK sells .. and so his movies become hits . on the other hand .. some really good movies do avg. business , like Naach minus its ending was a really good movie , but it became a flop (And I know a lot of ppl will say that it deserved to be a flop .. but I found it really good .. ).
And recently "Dhoom" was released .... it was a pathetic movie. I mean if u got to show action , at least show sth that is real .. you can't defy physics for god's sake .. this is not the matrix you are shooting in ... you don't do a 360 somersault on a moving truck and not even wobble a bit when u land.
And if you think hollywood movies were really good .. then I'll tell you that they can be pretty cliched as well .. for example if you saw "The terminal" recently , then you probably saw , that except for the location of the movie and a few other things .. there is hardly anything new .. it was pretty cliched .. a guy .. who is good and true to his heart ... his lone battle against a lot of ppl ... ppl help him because of his goodness ... and he emerges as a winner in the end ... hackneyed. And then there all these action movies..
I can go on and on about all the crap that the movies show .. but if u got what I said in this post .. then I don't need to elaborate on it.

The post that never made it

2005-03-28T03:00:00.000+05:30

I always get ideas about what to blog when I've got no source of jotting them down. Usually I get ideas before going to sleep , after I've retired to bed. Now if I think about getting up and writing it , I either feel too lazy or feel that I'll lose on some precious sleep. So all such ideas are wasted (not exactly .. but they never make it to the blog). It is infact not about the ideas .. it is about the whole thought process. For example .. the other day .. I wasn't feeling very sleepy when I lied down to sleep and I started thinking about all the popular movies (like the ones directed by Karan Johar , far-from-reality movies) , and my dislike for them ... I began from how such movies actually become hits , when all they show is mush , dreams , and ppl who cry on the smallest pretext. Now , after thinking a lot , I decided to get up , and turn on the computer .... but lazy me ... I thought it was too much of a trouble to turn on the computer , so I decided to write it down , in a concise manner , like notes . I wrote a few things down ... with the intention of expanding on it the next day .. but the next day .. I was blank . All the thing I wrote reminded of what I had thought the night before .. but somehow I wasn't as strongly convinced about it . I mean .. I am convinced that all these movies are total crap .. but I dunno .. the thought process seems lacking something. And so the result was that I never got posting it ... though I'll post it soon I guess.
Anyways .. this is how a lot of other ideas never made it to the blog . I had thought that as soon as my exams'll be over .. I'll be posting twice daily .. but that never happened .. and here I am , 2:30 in the night .. trying to analyze why that never happened.

Rubber ...

2005-03-24T16:49:00.000+05:30

Condom ads have envaded the telivision. The government , it seems is hell bent this time to make people use rubber. Ok ... but then ... they have , like , over-done it ... I mean .. there are condom ads in every third break between the cricket match , between popular TV serials and even on the radio broadcasts. The government it seems will not leave any stone unturned ... It is like a strict army general , looking over a map of India , telling his men in all seriousness ... "Gentlemen , the population must be controlled and we will fight to the end to accomplish our mission.".
There are ads showing members of the cricket team - Dravid and Sehwag (who has this typical way of saying it ...). Then there is this ad starring Rajpal Yadav. And there is this ad wherein an ecstasic man is dancing in the rain ... looks to be a retirement/finance plan ad at first ... turns out to be a rubber ad wherein the ecstasic man finally reaches the chemist amongst heavy rain and asks for a chhatri i.e. an umbrella ... pretty corny comparison. And they have put ads on every channel aired .... from Sony to DD sports to even Star Movies.
I don't mind these ads , but I am pretty relieved that this campaign was not started a year or two ago. Otherwise my inquistive younger brother would have made it hell for my parents asking them what a "condom" meant. My mother would have told him that it was something meant for "Bade Log". My father ... I dunno ... maybe he would have explained. But anyways ,now he is in high school and he knows everything from necking to third base ... so there is no uncomfortable situation. Yet I am sure that the "uncomfortable situation" would have been faced in a lot of families .And in some really conservative type of families , everybody in the family starts looking down and all that ... I mean whenever such an ad comes by .. everybody is like ... I-Promise-I-didn't-notice-it... he he ....
I wish they'd stop so many ads and save ppl a lot of trouble ... but they say that this is the only problem to bring the population in control ... ok .... carry on ... rubber the hell out of TV ... sell it like it's never been sold before ..

Phew ..

2005-03-24T16:18:00.000+05:30

I am back .... *Contorts his face , lifts one leg in air as a martial art pose , realizes he is looking really foolish ... back to the keyboard ..*
Finally the exams come to an end ..... and I am ecstasic ...
Last paper ... was horrible . Seemed fine ... till we discussed it after the paper ...

"Arrey .. it was M15 .... not M20"
Me : Shit !
"Arrey ... u didn't see the codes ? It was all given .."
Me : Shit !
"Arrey ... it was an ORS .. not URS .. "
Me : Shit ! Shit ! Shit !

Anyways ... the papers are finally over ... wooohooo ....

Almost done .....

2005-03-23T18:54:00.000+05:30

Almost done with my papers ... tomorrow .. the last one ... and the one subject I really like ... no ratta ... pure equation and equations ....
Enjoy this pic till then ... press [ctrl] + A and see the pic transform .... works only in Internet Explorer ...

njoy ...

2005-03-16T23:13:00.000+05:30

Papers ... aggrhh .....

Enjoy some art till then :

Shiner by Norman Rockwell

A day in the life of a little boy
by Norman Rockwell

Needless to say the idea of posting some art is not mine ..... ( Mist )

Empty

2005-03-10T12:25:00.000+05:30

I have nothing to blog about suddenly. I suddenly feel devoid of all energy. I don't know what to blog about .
I'll post something original in a few days. Meanwhile , here are a few quotes from the Alice in wonderland by Lewis Carrol. Sorry for posting quotes (I mean , I really don't like posting them ... but these are good ..)

‘What is the use of a book’, thought Alice, ‘without pictures or conversations?’

‘Curiouser and curiouser!’ cried Alice.

‘Then you should say what you mean,’ the March Hare went on. ‘I do,’ Alice hastily replied; ‘at least—at least I mean what I say—that’s the same thing, you know.’ ‘Not the same thing a bit!’ said the Hatter. ‘Why, you might just as well say that “I see what I eat” is the same thing as “I eat what I see!” ’

‘Take some more tea,’ the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly. ‘I’ve had nothing yet,’ Alice replied in an offended tone, ‘so I can’t take more.’ ‘You mean you can’t take less,’ said the Hatter: ‘it’s very easy to take more than nothing.’

‘That’s the reason they’re called lessons,’ the Gryphon remarked: ‘because they lessen from day to day.’

‘There’s nothing like eating hay when you’re faint’…‘I didn’t say there was nothing better,’ the King replied, ‘I said there was nothing like it.’

‘Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot into a left-hand shoe.’

The great Indian wedding

2005-03-01T15:31:00.000+05:30

This is an old post ... but I decided to republish it (Actually I am in no mood to write a new one ... and I never got comments on this one .... so ..), it is one of my favorite ( yeah , I got favorite posts as well .. ) .. it is about this big marriage in front of my house ... if you've never been to a North Indian marriage before , you'll probably not get what I mean (I don't know how marriage ceremonies take place in the rest of India ) ... but read on anyways ...

Yesterday we had this big marriage in front of our house. Boy these ppl sure knew how to boogie ... they did so till 4 in the morning.I could not get a minutes sleep. It was like I was trying to sleep on the dance floor. And the music selection was so lousy .... imagine playing Vengaboys again and again about 10 times or so. This was torture ... I can't listen to that shit even once. As if that was not enough .. the DJ kept on playing incomprehensible punjabi music .... crass cacophony. And finally the crowds favourite...."ladies and gentleman for your entertainment and aural pleasure only" .... 'Its the time to disco'. Whoa ! what a mindblowing track .... wish I could kill the DJ.
Loud music was not the only problem ... our colony became clogged with vehicles by 8 in the night and the baraat had not yet arrived. By 10 there was no parking in sight even outside the colony. Then there was this generator that was so placed that the pipe designed for its exaust pointed to my house so that any body who went outside came back gasping for air. The generator was also very noisy but we couldn't hear it before 4 am in all the DJ's noise (Lucky us !).Wonder when the couple will celebrate their marriage anniv. for they got married the next day morn instead of the date printed on the card.
Seeing the marriage and hearing what Gupta aunty and Sharma aunty had to say about the marriage the next day... these marriges appear to be one big show-off. Gupta aunty's eyes shone like the chandelier in yesterdays marriage ( It was so huge that u cud see it from a kilometer away ! ) when she told my mom about the money spent on everything from the flowers to the jewellery to the amount that came in the shagun to the car they gave away ( Skoda Octavia , my fav.... lucky bastard , the groom ). And my sleep was not the only thing that was devastated in the grand celebration. The lovely park in front of my house was in total ruins. All the plants were trampled upon and everything was a big mess. And to our dismay , ppl discovered in the evening that while the tent ppl made holes in the road for the tent poles , they managed to cut an underground wire so that there was a short circuit in the street-light wires and hence the colony remained in total darkness today , since the electrician was on a holiday too.
And all this was not the first time. The same family did a jaagaran some time back and we had to deal with deafeningly loud bhajans and aartis till about 5-6 in the morning. Imagine the bhajans were made on popular bollywood tunes ! For ex. 'Kaho na pyar hai ...' became 'Mata ka durbaar hai .. ' ! Either the creators of these bhajans lack originality or they want to impress the God with their sick sense of humour. In any case , I was not amused.

Dil , Dimaag aur Mann

2005-02-19T00:30:00.000+05:30

While conversing , people use different words to describe their inner self , the wors being : Dil , dimaag and mann. Ever thought what is the difference between the three (I never did before .. ). Well dil and dimaag have always been different , but which part of the body does mann refer to ? I mean everything is ultimately done by the dimaag only ... then what is mann ? We sometimes use mann and dil as synonyms ... for eg. , if someone is to say "Aaj mera mann nahin kar raha" , he can always say "aaj mera dil nahin kar raha". So dil can be used almost at all the places instead of mann ... but the vice-versa is not true. I mean u can say that "mera dil toot gaya" , but no one says "mera mann toot gaya" or "mera mann dhak-dhak kar raha hai !". So what does actually mann refer to ? I asked my mom ... and she happens to be quite a thinker . Her first reply was that it is dil and dimaag combined , but then she said that that mann refers to your inner conscience , your inner self. Hmm... now that seems like a valid definition. So this discussion is over.

Now the other thing I can not understand that where does the concept of love and heart come from .. I mean why do we always associate love with the heart , when almost everything happens in the brain ..? Hmm... It is no use searching it on the net ... all you can expect to find is loads of sites on love and heart care hospital sites and other irrelevent stuff. A well done search may actually yield results ... but then ... I am not really that interested in knowing the history of it all ... besides ... every site will give me a different history ... so it is of little use . I'll tell u what I think must be the way this concept came into being -
Well , cosider this very olden time , some Mr. X fell in love with this girl Ms. Y. Now some time later it was discovered that Ms. Y loved some Mr. Z. When Mr. X heard this , he got a shock. And then he got a heart attack due to the shock. The heart attack was minor , so he survived it to tell it to others how he fell this great pain in his heart when the love was no more. Later when Mr. Z came to know that Ms. Y loves him , he also got a minor heart attack. When he told the other people about this , they started believing somewhat that love's got sth to do with the heart. The word spread around , and people from different parts of the country confirmed this. Traders spread the word to other countries as well , and so the thing spread everywhere in the world. People confirmed the heart pains , others said that they've felt like this before and still others said that they had this dream wherein God confirmed it to them (The story gets satirical here). The church and the pandits never had a problem to this , so they also accepted the fact and started preaching that the love of God comes from the heart. And so the concept came into being ...
I tell u ... this must be true .. this is what must have happened .. this is how the concept must have come into existance. :-)

Scientific

2005-02-01T21:36:00.001+05:30

Yesterday I was doing a research (not exactly ... but sth like it) on windshield technology. I found out that broken windshields can be repaired. Really ? The thing got me thinking that if two exactly same windshields (which means same make , same batch , same everything ... ) are subjected to some sharp blow , in the identical fashion , at the same exact spot , then will they develop identical cracks ? Well the thing can be tested experimentally , using a simple machine.... but the answer will always be no ...they will never develop cracks in the same fashion. This can probably be attributed to the randomness of the arrangement of glass crystals in the windshield (remember 'Minority Report' ? each ball of wood that rolled out was unique because of the randomness inherent in the wood grains).

And this brings to my mind a similar problem that first came to my mind when I was in class 9th , the day I read about the twin paradox (ref. the special theory of relativity .For anyone who left science ages ago , it is supposed to be some really techie stuff , but the thing is not required here ... so read on ...). The problem considers two twins placed in two identical environments (hypothetical), sth like mirror worlds , and each of them faces the same things the other does , meets the same people etc. Now the problem is ... will they act in the same fashion at the same time throughout their lives ?. i.e. will both feel like peeing together , every single time they feel like that ? Will both mouth the same obscenities in identical ways if they are slapped in identical manners ? Will both of them vote for congress if they are handed the same numbered ballot paper in their respective worlds ? Will both of them stammer in the same fashion when they'll give their first interview (of course to identical bosses in identical offices) ? Or will they be different. Well technically they should behave in the same manner , but I think some thing will again induce some kind of randomness ... so that wouldn't happen . But I will love to see this experiment carried out practically one day (not possible)....

And now that I am talking about strange things , here is another one ... yesterday I was feeling very sleepy and I was yawning as well , but could not sleep. It was 2 in the night , so I forced myself to sleep. Now this happens lots of times , my mind always starts dreaming horrible things when I force-sleep. So yesterday , soon after sleeping , I started having nightmares , about ghosts and speaking clocks and ... and death. At some point of time , I got really frightened and wanted to scream. But tried as much as I might , I could not. I could not even move (and this is not a story that I am narrating ..). The state of temporary paralysis got over in a few seconds . When I finally got up , I was sweating and my limbs were feeling like I have just done a cross country. Now for God's sake .. I don't need a doctor. I happened to read about this phenomenon in the autobiography of the Nobel prize laureate Richard P. Feynman (maybe even I get a Nobel someday ... and just in case you start thinking that Richard P. Feynman was a psychotherapist or sth , I should tell u that he was a great scientist , physics). After that I got up and sat thinking why this happened . And I think I came to the right answer. Maybe all the body systems shut down when u sleep and take some time to start-up again (the way windows takes time to start , even if u hibernated it. My body was always lazy anyways .. ). Anyways .. then I turned on the CD player and slept peacefully , dreaming.

And talking about scientific minds ... Richard P. Feynman once stood on his head and pissed to find out if the piss falls down due to the force of gravity or is it squirted out with some force ... :-) .. now you know what kind of scientific inquisitiveness drives people who end up winning Nobel prizes.

Funny things happen after drinking ...

2005-01-28T14:43:00.000+05:30

We got drinking ... yet again , 2 days back. But this time it was a bit different. I stopped drinking after 2 and N went on to drink at least 5 (Not to mention the neat peg, right from the bottle .. a.k.a. Dharam paaji). Now since I was not drunk , I was in a much better state to see what exactly goes on after drinking. Now the usual didn't happen this time. N was overdrunk , as mentioned earlier , and he started with all his nonsense .Nonsense like .. "yaar , mujhse koi pyar nahin karta"(!!) and "Yaar tum meri wajah se bahut pareshaan ho na ?". Now what seemed like a joke at the beginning , turned to be really serious. N started crying, then he demanded more ... and when we denied him any more , he became violent ! He first took the coke bottle and smashed it to the ground , spilling sticky coke all over the floor. Then he pulled the door handle so hard that the latch came out , hurting him .. he was bleeding all over his hand ... but he still needed more Daru ! He was al messed up .. getting violent , crying , shouting obscenities. Finally we persuaded him to go to the loo to wash the wound. Now as he dipped his hand under the cold water , sth in the water got his fancy .. and he dipped his head under the water ! And then he wouldn't remove his head from under the tap ! (FYI , It is freezing in Delhi!). Somehow we got him out of there and then back to the room. But then his alcohol stained mind managed to recollect that there was still some Daru left, and he again started shouting for more. Another problem was that he wanted to go to his hostel at any cost , while there were at least 4 different places with guards between that hostel and the the hostel we were in. Finally G and J tied him down to G's bed and there he finally slept.
Once N was put to rest , we decided to end the drinking program , and then we went on to watch "You've got mail". This was , as far as I remember , the 6th time I was watching the movie , and it still seemed so nice ...
G and J then went on to see National Treaure , but I just can't see 1 movie after the other .. esp not after such a nice movie ... so I went off to sleep , thinking that I'll never drink after this ..... well , at least for some time....

Here is another 'pome'

All this drink ..
down the drain .
Short term euphoria
And then pain ..

And yet ...
Today I preach
What tomorrow ?

They say "It is but the devil himself"
"Has it done anybody any good ?"
But then , does anybody listen ?
It's no use telling me too ....
For I am also one of the 'anybody' ....

Though I lose my rhyme ..
It is due time ...
That I stop writng ..
And let things happen the way they are ..

Mahushala

2005-01-26T12:33:00.000+05:30

I found this english translation of the poem 'Madhushala' by Dr. Harivansh Rai Bachhan. Here are some excerpts from it :

My beloved wine-maiden seems a priest; her wine as pure as the Ganga's waters.
With unbroken pace, she rotates the rosary of wine glasses.
"Drink more! Drink more!" she intones in prayer.
I am Shiva incarnate and this tavern is my temple.

Life is short. How much love can I give and how much can I drink?
They say, "He departs," at the very moment that he is born.
While he is being welcomed, I have seen his farewell being prepared.
They started closing the shutters of the tavern, as soon as they were raised.

Yama will come as the wine-maiden and bring his black wine,
Drink, and know no more consciousness, O carefree one.
This is the ultimate trance, the ultimate wine-maiden and the ultimate goblet.
O traveller, drink judiciously, for you will never find the tavern again.

If anyone asks my name, say it was, "The Drunkard".
My work? I drank and passed the goblet to everyone.
O Beloved, if they ask my caste, say only that I was mad.
Say my religion worshipped goblets and then chant with your rosary, "The tavern, the tavern!"

For more visit here . For anyone who would like to read the full poem in hindi , visit here . The poem is really beautifully written. Some part of it was even released as music album , rendered by Manna Dey and selected by Harivansh Rai Bachhan himself. The album is really good too ...

On what happened on new year's eve

2005-01-08T13:24:00.002+05:30

On the new years eve ( As planned a month in advance ) , we got drunk in the hostel. Here is all that happened :
It was G's birthday on 1st of January and he was the one sponsoring the drinks. We were 5 ppl and so he got 5 quarters of drink. 1 backed out at the last moment and so we were 4 ppl left with 5 quarters of drink ... J , G , N and me. Now the drinks had been procured , we had to decide weather to to get drunk and then enter the new year or weather to enter the new year and then get drunk. Orginal plan was to start at 12 sharp , but G said that his folks may call up at night to wish him , so we shifted the plan to 12:30. At 12:30 , finally we sat drinking. The first peg was a Patiyala + Ludhiyana (Read really large) , in coke. Finished with it , we began looking at each other and started making funny faces. Finally I got up to fix another round. To our dismay ... we fell short of coke. Coke was left only for 1 more round of drinks and so we reserved it for the last. So for the first time , we took alcohol in water. Tasted yuck ... but we desperately wanted to get drunk. So we gulped down the second round and I poured out the remainants of the whisky bottle for the third round. Then we were left with a quarter of rum and some coke. G insisted we finish that off as well , but the truth was that we had already had enough. The truth was that we had already started dancing with the glasses on our heads and J was lying on the floor , rolling with laughter. The truth was that we should have stopped there and then. I told them to stock the bottle of rum for some other time. But they were drunk ... and so was I. The bottle was opened and we had our 4th round for the day. Finally ... each of us had had a quarter of a quarter more than a quarter (Read that slowly .. and u'll get what that means) of alcohol and were quite drunk (Though I guess I should mention here that I took half of peg less of Rum , so I was a little less drunk ..). Finally , exhausting all the alcohol , we set out on the college roads. First came the hostel gate with a guard. I guess we managed to walk straight (or so it seemed) , and without making much noise , we got out of the hostel. Then we went to this particular point on the road where we had sat down the last time we had gotten drunk (That was the only the second time , just in case u start thinking that I am a drunkard). We sat there for a while. J started speaking in his drunk-english which means english without words like in , the , a , are etc. Meanwhile N came to me and started explaining me what it takes to be a freind , in his bihari-english , very funny indeed. G was as usual calm and started talking about his crush on this girl in our class. And me ? I became very quiet ... as usual (Usual when I become drunk , otherwise , I can out-talk anyone).
But unlike always , we were over-drunk. After about half an hour of sitting and saying and hearing all kinds of nonsense .. we got up to pee in the nearby bushes. G got up first , went to the bushes and fell in. All of us started laughing , but actually , we were so numb that we took a lot of time to get up and help him up. Finally , when he got him up .. he told us that he had lost his chappal in the bushes. After some time , we were all frantically going through the bushes , drunk and numb , trying to find G's chappals. Finally I found it (Told u I was the least drunk ... ). Then as we started going back to the hostel , N puked. J took him to the hostel. Me and G then sat down and started talking. . Then I lied down alone (on the footpath!) and G began making calls to probably everyone he knew ... his balance dipped by at least 35 bucks that night. Then we went back to the hostel and met J at G's room. Now I was standing in the balcony , when G puked , in his room , all around the bed. I ran out of the balcony , out of his room , and finally I met J at J's room. Now both N and G had been put to sleep , and J was telling me to run to the bathroom at the slightest feeling of puke. Then we just sat outside his room and kept on talking about other nonsensical things and stopped when we finally slept at 4:30 in the morning.
This is how I celebrated the new years eve.

Into a new year

2005-01-01T15:53:00.000+05:30

Just finished The hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. An extremely out of this universe book. A must read for everyone.

I was thinking to myself that why is it that everytime you finish a book or a movie ( Only interesting ones ), u suddenly feel very dull , as to why it ended at all .... It always hapens with me ... So that I can't read one book immediately after finishing with another , or see end to end movies ... Why does it happen ? I guess this happens because instead of just seeing the movie or reading the book , you start living in it ... you associate with it subconsciously so that when it gets over , u feel dull that your new found life , that was so different and interestng than your present dull and monotonous one got over. But I think that this does not happen with many people. My mother says that I live in my dreams a little too much , and that is why this happens .... maybe. Maybe that is the reason I like to sleep so much ;-).

Meanwhile , finally 2004 is over. Phew ! What a dreadfully long year it was .... And now 2005 is here , I look forward to a lot of things. College will start in a few days , but this time I want to think less about her and more about other things. Other things being losing weight and improving my grades. I hope that this time I don't end up forgetting my new year resolution. But I guess this new year is just a change of date and nothing else. Nothing is going to change. But still I'll try my best. I wish luck to myself.

Invicticus

2004-12-20T15:50:00.000+05:30

Out of the night that covers me ,
Black as the pit from pole to pole ,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud ,
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody ,but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade ,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds ,and shall find me ,unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate ,
How charged with punishments the scroll ,
I am the master of my fate : I am the captain of my soul

William Ernest Henely

Yesterday I found this poem in my drawer. This was the poem that Timothy McVeigh (An American, who bombed some place, and was executed) presented as his last statement.

Marriage in front of my house

2004-12-12T15:47:00.000+05:30

Yesterday we had this big marriage in front of our house. Boy these ppl sure knew how to boogie ... they did so till 4 in the morning.I could not get a minutes sleep. It was like I was trying to sleep on the dance floor. And the music selection was so lousy .... imagine playing Vengaboys again and again about 10 times or so. This was torture ... I can't listen to that shit even once. As if that was not enough .. the DJ kept on playing incomprehensible punjabi music .... crass cacophony. And finally the crowds favourite...."ladies and gentleman for your entertainment and pleasure only" .... 'Its the time to disco'. Whoa ! what a mindblowing track .... wish I could kill the DJ.
Loud music was not the only problem ... our colony became clogged with vehicles by 8 in the night and the baraat had not yet arrived. By 10 there was no parking in sight even outside the colony. Then there was this generator that was so placed that the pipe designed for its exaust pointed to my house so that any body who went outside came back gasping for air. The generator was also very noisy but we couldn't hear it before 4 am in all the DJ's noise (Lucky us !).Wonder when the couple will celebrate their marriage anniv. for they got married the next day morn instead of the date printed on the card.
Seeing the marriage and hearing what Gupta aunty and Sharma aunty had to say about the marriage the next day... these marriges appear to be one big show-off. Gupta aunty's eyes shone like the chandelier in yesterdays marriage ( It was so huge that u cud see it from a kilometer away ! ) when she told my mom about the money spent on everything from the flowers to the jewellery to the amount that came in the shagan to the car they gave away ( Skoda Octavia , my fav.... lucky bastard , the groom ). And my sleep was not the only thing that was devastated in the grand celebration. The lovely park in front of my house was in total ruins. All the plants were trampled upon and everything was a big mess. And to our dismay , ppl discovered in the evening that while the tent ppl made holes in the road for the tent poles , they managed to cut an underground wire so that there was a short circuit in the street-light wires and hence the colony remained in total darkness today , since the electrician was on a holiday too.
And all this was not the first time. The same family did a jaagaran some time back and we had to deal with deafeningly loud bhajans and aartis till about 5-6 in the morning. Imagine the bhajans were made on popular bollywood tunes ! For ex. 'Kaho na pyar hai ...' became 'Mata ka durbaar hai .. ' ! Either the creators of these bhajans lack originality or they want to impress the God with their sick sense of humour. In any case , I was not amused.

Too many things happening ....

2004-12-11T15:42:00.000+05:30

Too many things are happening , all at once in my life ....

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Second : I am getting spiritually inclined ! I used to be a firm atheist , but recently I have started believing in the existance of some phenomenen that underlies everything. And this is not because of some baba etc..... I posted another blog on the same , so if u want to read this , visit here. I am reading this book called the celestine prophecy (James Redfield)... not a very well written book , but with every page , I become more convinced that there is more to human life than what science told us.

Third : My mother does not keep well and I get so worried sometimes .... she's gotten a lot of diseases , but that does not make her sick. It is sth in her mind... she just can't accept the fact that she is no more in perfect state of health. This makes her even more sad ... and this intensifies her already diseased condition . She is heading to terminal sickness ... and I can't help it...she will not listen. But I am happy now .. she is finally trying to come out . Yet sth saddening happens and she returns to her original state.

Other things happening are that I am not losing weight . Not that I am trying very hard but can't some miracle happen ? ;-)