The cliched movies

I wanted to write about this since a long time ... here it goes ....
Most of the popular hindi movies are really crap (A lot of hollywood movies too ... but we'll talk about that later). They show situations that so far from reality that if you are not dreaming while seeing the movie .. you'll leave after the first 15 minutes. Though there is another way of jhelo-ing the movie , make fun of it right through it.
So why do I find them so bad ? Well .. ever heard anybody in real life say things like "Main tumse itna pyar karta hoon jitna gagan dharti se karta hai .. bhanwra phoolon se karta hai .. pahaar aur vaadiyan gawah hain etc. etc. " ?? The people who say such things in real life actually never came out of the last SRK movie they saw. Well if someone was to say sth like that to me .. I wud tell him to f off into all the pahaar and bageeche he has been talking about. And this is not the only thing that is far-from-real in hindi movies , there are other things that can seem really odd .. like the hero and heroine start singing in surround Dolby sound all of a sudden .. and every hero in every movie (almost) can sing. And then extras appear out of thin air and start dancing in synchro with the actors. I don't say that good movies are not made .. I mean .. some of them are so good that you can forgive the hero and heroine sing in really loud voices , but most of them have cliched song-dance routine ... hero-heroine , extras , some exotic location , dupatta flying , words like dil,pyar,muhobbat,jaan,jigar, etc in every 2nd line .. and a song is made. Otherwise there is this new trend , item no.s in clubs .. almost every villian goes to a dance bar now and then .. and every dance bar he goes to has this pretty chick who belts out original numbers and dances to them with a lot of ooomph (read really small clothes and lewd guestures). Yet we have been so used to seeing all this stuff .. that it doesn't seem odd anymore. For example .. the songs ... that every hero sings .. it is like a part and parcel of almost every hindi movie .. and so we hardly find it odd ..
But not all the popular movies are bad .. recently 'Black' was good .. most of the Ram Gopal Verma films are good .. a lot of other movies are good .. some comedies are good too .. but what I am really aginst is SRK type of movies .. movies like Kuchh kuchh hota hai , Main hoon na etc. etc. .. and what is more surprising is the fact that thet go on to become big hits. When I see these movies ( I don't now .. but u do get to see some scenes now and then ) .. I can see right through them .. not one second can I associate with the movie .. the perfectionist hero , the extra-heavy dialogues , the emotions , the drama .. what about the real life. I am not against SRK .. I think he is a good actor (I really don't think so .. but since I am no authority on it .. I have no right to comment on his acting ) .. but most of his movies are sick. The last SRK movie that I found good was Ashoka , or probably Swades. But SRK sells .. and so his movies become hits . on the other hand .. some really good movies do avg. business , like Naach minus its ending was a really good movie , but it became a flop (And I know a lot of ppl will say that it deserved to be a flop .. but I found it really good .. ).
And recently "Dhoom" was released .... it was a pathetic movie. I mean if u got to show action , at least show sth that is real .. you can't defy physics for god's sake .. this is not the matrix you are shooting in ... you don't do a 360 somersault on a moving truck and not even wobble a bit when u land.
And if you think hollywood movies were really good .. then I'll tell you that they can be pretty cliched as well .. for example if you saw "The terminal" recently , then you probably saw , that except for the location of the movie and a few other things .. there is hardly anything new .. it was pretty cliched .. a guy .. who is good and true to his heart ... his lone battle against a lot of ppl ... ppl help him because of his goodness ... and he emerges as a winner in the end ... hackneyed. And then there all these action movies..
I can go on and on about all the crap that the movies show .. but if u got what I said in this post .. then I don't need to elaborate on it.

The post that never made it

I always get ideas about what to blog when I've got no source of jotting them down. Usually I get ideas before going to sleep , after I've retired to bed. Now if I think about getting up and writing it , I either feel too lazy or feel that I'll lose on some precious sleep. So all such ideas are wasted (not exactly .. but they never make it to the blog). It is infact not about the ideas .. it is about the whole thought process. For example .. the other day .. I wasn't feeling very sleepy when I lied down to sleep and I started thinking about all the popular movies (like the ones directed by Karan Johar , far-from-reality movies) , and my dislike for them ... I began from how such movies actually become hits , when all they show is mush , dreams , and ppl who cry on the smallest pretext. Now , after thinking a lot , I decided to get up , and turn on the computer .... but lazy me ... I thought it was too much of a trouble to turn on the computer , so I decided to write it down , in a concise manner , like notes . I wrote a few things down ... with the intention of expanding on it the next day .. but the next day .. I was blank . All the thing I wrote reminded of what I had thought the night before .. but somehow I wasn't as strongly convinced about it . I mean .. I am convinced that all these movies are total crap .. but I dunno .. the thought process seems lacking something. And so the result was that I never got posting it ... though I'll post it soon I guess.
Anyways .. this is how a lot of other ideas never made it to the blog . I had thought that as soon as my exams'll be over .. I'll be posting twice daily .. but that never happened .. and here I am , 2:30 in the night .. trying to analyze why that never happened.

Rubber ...

Condom ads have envaded the telivision. The government , it seems is hell bent this time to make people use rubber. Ok ... but then ... they have , like , over-done it ... I mean .. there are condom ads in every third break between the cricket match , between popular TV serials and even on the radio broadcasts. The government it seems will not leave any stone unturned ... It is like a strict army general , looking over a map of India , telling his men in all seriousness ... "Gentlemen , the population must be controlled and we will fight to the end to accomplish our mission.".
There are ads showing members of the cricket team - Dravid and Sehwag (who has this typical way of saying it ...). Then there is this ad starring Rajpal Yadav. And there is this ad wherein an ecstasic man is dancing in the rain ... looks to be a retirement/finance plan ad at first ... turns out to be a rubber ad wherein the ecstasic man finally reaches the chemist amongst heavy rain and asks for a chhatri i.e. an umbrella ... pretty corny comparison. And they have put ads on every channel aired .... from Sony to DD sports to even Star Movies.
I don't mind these ads , but I am pretty relieved that this campaign was not started a year or two ago. Otherwise my inquistive younger brother would have made it hell for my parents asking them what a "condom" meant. My mother would have told him that it was something meant for "Bade Log". My father ... I dunno ... maybe he would have explained. But anyways ,now he is in high school and he knows everything from necking to third base ... so there is no uncomfortable situation. Yet I am sure that the "uncomfortable situation" would have been faced in a lot of families .And in some really conservative type of families , everybody in the family starts looking down and all that ... I mean whenever such an ad comes by .. everybody is like ... I-Promise-I-didn't-notice-it... he he ....
I wish they'd stop so many ads and save ppl a lot of trouble ... but they say that this is the only problem to bring the population in control ... ok .... carry on ... rubber the hell out of TV ... sell it like it's never been sold before ..

Phew ..

I am back .... *Contorts his face , lifts one leg in air as a martial art pose , realizes he is looking really foolish ... back to the keyboard ..*
Finally the exams come to an end ..... and I am ecstasic ...
Last paper ... was horrible . Seemed fine ... till we discussed it after the paper ...

"Arrey .. it was M15 .... not M20"
Me : Shit !
"Arrey ... u didn't see the codes ? It was all given .."
Me : Shit !
"Arrey ... it was an ORS .. not URS .. "
Me : Shit ! Shit ! Shit !

Anyways ... the papers are finally over ... wooohooo ....

Almost done .....

Almost done with my papers ... tomorrow .. the last one ... and the one subject I really like ... no ratta ... pure equation and equations ....
Enjoy this pic till then ... press [ctrl] + A and see the pic transform .... works only in Internet Explorer ...

njoy ...

Papers ... aggrhh .....

Enjoy some art till then :

Shiner by Norman Rockwell

A day in the life of a little boy
by Norman Rockwell

Needless to say the idea of posting some art is not mine ..... ( Mist )

Empty

I have nothing to blog about suddenly. I suddenly feel devoid of all energy. I don't know what to blog about .
I'll post something original in a few days. Meanwhile , here are a few quotes from the Alice in wonderland by Lewis Carrol. Sorry for posting quotes (I mean , I really don't like posting them ... but these are good ..)

‘What is the use of a book’, thought Alice, ‘without pictures or conversations?’

‘Curiouser and curiouser!’ cried Alice.

‘Then you should say what you mean,’ the March Hare went on. ‘I do,’ Alice hastily replied; ‘at least—at least I mean what I say—that’s the same thing, you know.’ ‘Not the same thing a bit!’ said the Hatter. ‘Why, you might just as well say that “I see what I eat” is the same thing as “I eat what I see!” ’

‘Take some more tea,’ the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly. ‘I’ve had nothing yet,’ Alice replied in an offended tone, ‘so I can’t take more.’ ‘You mean you can’t take less,’ said the Hatter: ‘it’s very easy to take more than nothing.’

‘That’s the reason they’re called lessons,’ the Gryphon remarked: ‘because they lessen from day to day.’

‘There’s nothing like eating hay when you’re faint’…‘I didn’t say there was nothing better,’ the King replied, ‘I said there was nothing like it.’

‘Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot into a left-hand shoe.’

The great Indian wedding

This is an old post ... but I decided to republish it (Actually I am in no mood to write a new one ... and I never got comments on this one .... so ..), it is one of my favorite ( yeah , I got favorite posts as well .. ) .. it is about this big marriage in front of my house ... if you've never been to a North Indian marriage before , you'll probably not get what I mean (I don't know how marriage ceremonies take place in the rest of India ) ... but read on anyways ...

Yesterday we had this big marriage in front of our house. Boy these ppl sure knew how to boogie ... they did so till 4 in the morning.I could not get a minutes sleep. It was like I was trying to sleep on the dance floor. And the music selection was so lousy .... imagine playing Vengaboys again and again about 10 times or so. This was torture ... I can't listen to that shit even once. As if that was not enough .. the DJ kept on playing incomprehensible punjabi music .... crass cacophony. And finally the crowds favourite...."ladies and gentleman for your entertainment and aural pleasure only" .... 'Its the time to disco'. Whoa ! what a mindblowing track .... wish I could kill the DJ.
Loud music was not the only problem ... our colony became clogged with vehicles by 8 in the night and the baraat had not yet arrived. By 10 there was no parking in sight even outside the colony. Then there was this generator that was so placed that the pipe designed for its exaust pointed to my house so that any body who went outside came back gasping for air. The generator was also very noisy but we couldn't hear it before 4 am in all the DJ's noise (Lucky us !).Wonder when the couple will celebrate their marriage anniv. for they got married the next day morn instead of the date printed on the card.
Seeing the marriage and hearing what Gupta aunty and Sharma aunty had to say about the marriage the next day... these marriges appear to be one big show-off. Gupta aunty's eyes shone like the chandelier in yesterdays marriage ( It was so huge that u cud see it from a kilometer away ! ) when she told my mom about the money spent on everything from the flowers to the jewellery to the amount that came in the shagun to the car they gave away ( Skoda Octavia , my fav.... lucky bastard , the groom ). And my sleep was not the only thing that was devastated in the grand celebration. The lovely park in front of my house was in total ruins. All the plants were trampled upon and everything was a big mess. And to our dismay , ppl discovered in the evening that while the tent ppl made holes in the road for the tent poles , they managed to cut an underground wire so that there was a short circuit in the street-light wires and hence the colony remained in total darkness today , since the electrician was on a holiday too.
And all this was not the first time. The same family did a jaagaran some time back and we had to deal with deafeningly loud bhajans and aartis till about 5-6 in the morning. Imagine the bhajans were made on popular bollywood tunes ! For ex. 'Kaho na pyar hai ...' became 'Mata ka durbaar hai .. ' ! Either the creators of these bhajans lack originality or they want to impress the God with their sick sense of humour. In any case , I was not amused.